Recovery Tools
Toni’s Blog
My People-Pleasing
From the time I was a young child, I never felt secure, confident or accepted. These insecurities gave the enemy an opening into my heart. He planted the lie in my mind that if I were perfect, I would be loved. Perfection in every task and responsibility set before...
My Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Coping mechanisms are defined as techniques we use to help us manage the stress and pain in our lives. Common coping mechanisms are avoidance and isolation, denial, busyness, rationalization and control. From my childhood, I learned avoidance and isolation to keep...
My Mask of Perfection
Click Here for the Spanish Version! From the time I was a small child, I did not use my voice and hid in the background to keep under the radar. As a result, I became what people wanted me to be. I was labeled, “The good, quiet one.” I was fearful of rejection, so...
The Tool of Detachment
John 10:10a, 1st Corinthians 14:33b, Proverbs 6:19b, James 1:19 The tool of detachment gives me the ability to love someone without getting caught up in their dysfunction. Satan is the author of confusion, chaos, and discord among the brethren and our families. He has...
Idolatry
What is idolatry and how do we define it? I believe idolatry is the act of putting something or someone before God in our thoughts or hearts by obsessing over or being consumed by it. This idol can be your job, money, a sport or hobby, a relationship, or a physical...
Self-Pity
Self-Pity Philippians 2:2-4, Galatians 5:22-23 God wants me to spend less time thinking of myself, and more time thinking of Him and others. Self-pity is being consumed with thoughts about oneself, usually regarding some unfair situation or treatment by others. ...
Secrets
John 8:31-32, 36 Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed Him, “If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” “Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.” “You’re only...
Bread from Heaven
I would rather go back to what is familiar even if it is bondage… Exodus 16: 3-4a And the children of Israel said to them, “Oh that we had died by the hand of the Lord in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the pots of meat and when we ate bread to the full! For you...
Awareness, Acceptance, and Action
Awareness, Acceptance, and Action: The 3 A’s to true Healing and Hope. There can be no change without AWARENESS. AWARENESS is understanding and reflecting on a situation, person, or feeling with openness and curiosity (as defined by peopleleaders.com.au). For...
Come to Jesus
Let us therefore come boldly onto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in timeof need. (Hebrews 4:16) I was fearful to speak up as a child, continually striving for perfection but never attaining it. I had an over developed sense of...
Blind Spots—a Tool the Enemy Uses
Fear, Busyness, and Blind Spots: 3 Tools the Enemy Uses to Keep Us in Bondage Part 3 "BLIND SPOTS" Part 1 "FEAR" (here) Part 2 "BUSYNESS" (here) The last area we will look at is blind spots. Blind spots are areas in my life in which I have been wounded...
Busyness—a Tool the Enemy Uses
Fear, Busyness, and Blind Spots: 3 Tools the enemy uses to keep us in bondage. Part 2 "BUSYNESS" (Part 1 here) Another tactic the enemy uses is busyness. God’s Word says, “Be still and know that I am God….” (Psalm 46:10) I was so involved in my children’s school...
Fear—a Tool the Enemy Uses
Fear, Busyness, and Blind Spots: 3 Tools the Enemy Uses to Keep Us in Bondage Part 1 "FEAR" What is preventing me from recognizing I have a problem? Fear is a tool the enemy uses to keep me in my dysfunction: the fear of change, the fear of the unknown, and fear that...
Freedom from Shame
I define shame as a heavy, black wool cloak that covers my head and weighs me down. Under it, my head and body are bent over, my eyes are cast down and my spirits are down. I have feelings of despair, regret and weakness. I feel all alone and isolated in this dark...