Who Are Your Balcony Peeps?

Who Are Your Balcony Peeps?

Who Are Your Balcony Peeps?

By Toni Weisz/Recovery Tools

Scripture References: Hebrews 10:24 and Matthew 11:28–30

Balcony peeps (people) are individuals who cheer you on in your life. They are literally hanging over the railing of a balcony, cheering you on in your walk with Jesus and in the hard things you have experienced in your life. They are your cheerleaders.

Who do you see as your balcony peeps? Can you see their faces? Can you hear their words of encouragement?

Too many people, even in ministry, are not kind, gentle, loving, or supportive. I have experienced a lot of pride lately in leadership roles, and it makes me very sad because I know that is not pleasing to our God.

In the book, Balcony People, the author talks about the toxic people in our lives and how much importance we put on their words instead of focusing on the positive people God has put in our lives that help stir us up to love and good works. (Ref. Hebrews 10:24)

 

Here is a poem by an anonymous source taken from the book, Balcony People by Joyce Landorf Heatherley:

I was hungry and you formed a humanities club to discuss my hunger.
THANK YOU.

I was imprisoned and you crept off quietly to your chapel to pray for my release.
NICE.

I was naked, and in your mind, you debated the morality of my appearance.
WHAT GOOD DID THAT DO?

I was sick and you knelt and thanked God for your health.
BUT I NEEDED YOU.

I was homeless and you preached to me of the shelter of the love of God.
I WISH YOU’D TAKEN ME HOME.

I was lonely and you left me alone to pray for me.
WHY DIDN’T YOU STAY?

You seem so holy, so close to God; but I’m still very hungry, lonely, cold, and still in pain.
DOES IT MATTER?

 

How do we meet these women’s needs? They need a safe place to come to lay their burdens down. That’s why we do the Sunday Conference calls. We want to be the hands and feet of Jesus to these dear precious women. We provide a community of women who have experienced the same trauma because we have walked the same walk. We know through experience what they are feeling.

They are yearning to feel deeply connected in a safe community. They have been used and abused and feel isolated in their pain, and they are vulnerable to the attacks of the evil one. They desire to be seen by others. They need love, support, and encouragement that one day, if they seek God with their whole heart, they will be healed. But it’s hard work, and that is what we are here for, to cheer them on and to help them heal from their past trauma. It is God that leads them to us, and it’s through the power of Jesus, the Word of God, and the work of the Holy Spirit that they are healed. We are just vessels God uses to accomplish this miraculous work.

We meet their spiritual needs as well as physical needs. We do not judge them for the things that have happened to them in their past because that does not define them. We love them, and we know they are weary with their pain and trauma from their past.

We are reminded of the words of Jesus in Matthew 11:28–30: “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

I thank God for each of you on this call today. I know most of your stories, and I am in awe of God and the work He has been doing in your lives. I get to watch God miraculously heal your broken hearts, bodies, minds, and spirits. I am truly honored and humbled by the privilege to serve in this ministry and for each and every one of you.

Questions to take to heart:

  1. Who are your balcony peeps, your cheerleaders?
  2. Do you see them hanging over the balcony cheering you on? What are they saying to you?
  3. Who are you encouraging? For those that are just beginning your healing journey, take care of yourself and your family first, then you can reach out to others.
  4. How can we pray for you on your healing journey?

Please reach out if you need to talk this week. Send me a text at: 561-327-7274 or email me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

You are loved,
Toni

Read more of Toni's blogs HERE.
Lord, I Want to Be Healed

Lord, I Want to Be Healed

Lord, I Want to Be Healed

by Toni Weisz/Spiritual Disciplines

Scripture References: John 10:10b, Ephesians 3:20, Isaiah 41:10, Luke 19:10 and Psalm 40:1–3

 

If we truly want to be healed from our past trauma, we must be willing to surrender all to God. We must step out and trust Him completely in this process even when it gets scary and it’s unpredictable and out of our control.

For those who have experienced abuse and abortion in our past, it is hard to let go of control because it was our protection, so we thought.

We have to come to the point where we don’t want to just survive, we want to live the abundant life Jesus came to give us (Read John 10:10b). We no longer want to just settle; we want to experience true love and acceptance, perhaps for the first time in our lives.

If you are reading this blog, you most likely have decided you want to be healed, too. You are courageous and tired of the life you were living and want more. You want to stop the cycle of dysfunction in your life and for future generations. This is a long and very hard process, but it is worth it.

If you are willing, God is able to do exceedingly abundantly more than what you can ask or think (Read Ephesians 3:20). That’s the God we serve. He is not limited by time and space. He is eternal.

I remember back in 2006, when God called me to the post–abortion ministry, starting a journal called, “Why are the relationships closest to me toxic?” God gave me awareness that there was something going on in my relationships with those closest to me. But what was it? I was the common denominator, so what was I doing to enable these toxic relationships?

I discovered over a ten-year period of relentlessly going to God as a broken surrendered woman, “Lord I want to be healed from all the pain, rejection, abuse and my abortion. I want to be set free from my people–pleasing and fear of man. I want to know your love in the innermost parts of my being. I want to feel loved, cherished, and safe, but how do I get there?”

God was so gentle with me because He knew how fragile I was after a lifetime of pain, rejection and trauma. He was leading me with His righteous right hand on a path of healing that was so difficult at times, but it was also beautiful (Read Isaiah 41:10).

I discovered the heart of God on this journey, and for that, I am most grateful. To know the Father’s heart towards us is life transforming. He is love, gentle, kind, faithful, peaceful, generous, powerful, and eternal. He is close to the abused, neglected, abandoned, and broken. He came to seek and to save the lost (Read Luke 19:10). We were all that at one point. But God in His infinite wisdom, His abounding grace and love picked us up out of the pit and placed us on the rock, Jesus Christ our Lord, our strong foundation (Read Psalm 40:2).

Hallelujah!!! Thank you, Jesus.

 

Questions to take to heart:

  1. When did God show you the dysfunction in your life?
  2. What was your next step after your awareness?
  3. How is God healing you? Who or what did He use to accomplish this?
  4. How can we pray for you?

Please reach out if you need prayer or a word of encouragement. You can email me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

I watched this movie recently that truly blessed my heart: Kendrick Brothers’ Show me the Father.

Here is the YouTube trailer: https://youtu.be/k4g0CFfGkMk

I pray it blesses your heart also.

 

You are loved,

Toni

 

 

I Make All Things New

I Make All Things New

I Make all Things New
By Toni Weisz/Spiritual Disciplines

 

Scripture References: Revelation 21:1–5, Ephesians 2:8–9, Ephesians 3:14–21

Revelation 21:1–5
Now I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away. Also there was no more sea. Then I, John, saw the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from heaven saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and He will dwell with them, and they shall be His people. God Himself will be with them and be their God. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”

Then He who sat on the throne said, “Behold, I make all things new.” And He said to me, “Write, for these words are true and faithful.”

God has given me, and those who serve with me in this ministry, a special privilege to walk alongside you courageous brave women on your healing journey. We have watched you come broken and scared to share your secrets of trauma from your past abortions and abuse. You are fearful of condemnation and judgement. Letting go of your secrets is not an easy thing, especially for those who have been carrying them for many decades.

But our merciful kind and loving Father doesn’t want you doing this alone anymore. He wants you healed to become the women He created you to be.

I have watched God in my own life take a broken, depressed, suicidal, tormented woman and lift me off the ground, and show me His great love, by opening my spiritual eyes to see that I was a sinner headed for hell.

My life was transformed when I heard the Gospel for the first time that Jesus was born of a virgin, lived a sinless life, was crucified, died, buried and rose again on the third day, to defeat death and Satan. He took my place on the cross, He paid my sin debt. I went running to Jesus to rescue me from the torment of a life I had been living for 34 years. I can never repay Him for the gift of salvation that He gave to me.

Ephesians 2:8–9
For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

Our healing process is a lifelong journey. I was amazed at how broken and dysfunctional I was when I started my healing back in 2006. All the time the enemy had me deceived that I was fine, no need to look at my past trauma because it was such a long time ago. “I was good.”

That could not be farther from the truth. You see, the evil one wants to keep us isolated sitting in darkness being tormented by him because then he has us exactly where he wants us.

But God does not want His daughters tormented anymore. He wants us to be healed and set free from the enemy and from our own distorted view of the truth. He wants us to have the courage to step out and trust Him to lead us. He wants us to use our voices and our testimonies to help others to step out also. It is a hard process, but it is so beautiful because Jesus gently leads us by His righteous right hand.

Jesus gave me a new life, a new song, and a new purpose. He has made all things new for me, and I know He can do this for you too if you will humble yourself before Him and trust Him. He loves you more than you can comprehend.

My prayer for you:
Ephesians 3:14–21

For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height—to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

 

If you’re wondering how you too can have this new life in Jesus:

First, we must have a relationship with Jesus our Savior. He is our healer. There is no true life change without Him. (Salvation)

Second, we must have courage to step out and trust Him. This is hard to do, but we must trust Him in this process. (Trust)

Third, we must spend time daily reading God’s Word and praying. (Daily Devotions)

Fourth, we must be accountable to others. (Accountability)

Fifth, we must continue to want to be healed in all our broken places. This is a lifelong process. (Perseverance)

Sixth, we then go out and share our testimony so other women will have the courage to step out and be healed. (Sharing Our Testimony)


Questions to take to heart:

  1. Where are you in your healing process? Salvation, Trust, Daily Devotions, Accountability, Perseverance, or Sharing Your Testimony?
  2. Are you ready to go to the next level in your healing?
  3. How can we encourage you on your healing journey?

I pray this topic has been helpful for you. Please reach out to me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

You are loved,

Toni

 

“You Make all Things New”
Big Daddy Weave

https://youtu.be/4_2aX_i4qpM?si=bJrJBO7ppX2n4j2Q

 

Spiritual Warfare

Spiritual Warfare

The Enemy Is Prowling
by Toni Weisz/Spiritual Warfare

Scripture References: 1 Peter 5:8, Romans 8:1 and Philippians 4:13

 

Be sober, be vigilant; for your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. 1 Peter 5:8

I have been under a barrage of attacks by the evil one since I shared the gospel in a letter to two of my family members. I want them to hear the gospel one more time so they can have confidence that when they pass from this life to the next, they can know they are saved and will be in heaven when they die. Not only that, but at the time of this writing, we have three, and possibly four, Recovery Bible Studies starting within the next few weeks. That’s a lot of women hearing the gospel, being healed and set free from the trauma of abortion and abuse.

The first week, the enemy used family. My kids were not in a good place, some hard conversations happened, and people were offended. Finally, they were able to communicate and work things out, without my help. The enemy was trying to get me to fret and worry and jump in and to take matters into my own hands (my old character defect of codependency and fear) instead of trusting God.

Then on a Saturday, the enemy used people in spiritual leadership. We were in a group setting, but I felt ignored and not included in the discussions. God showed me from this example what not to do as a spiritual leader. I am to be aware of everyone in the group. We all need encouragement and to feel included.

Then on a Sunday, a leader at church made a weird comment. Again, God showed me how important my words are. They can uplift people or put people down. The enemy was trying to use spiritual leaders to pick my rejection wound, desiring to awaken my people-pleasing character defect (my old character defect of people pleasing, putting others before God, which is idolatry).

Then a few days later, the enemy used a woman who was very involved in serving in this ministry for many years, to react in a peculiar way and say some hurtful things. This one hurt pretty deeply. Again, I did not react. I actually did not send a text I had written because honestly, I did not know what to say. Instead, I prayed for her because obviously she is not in a good place. My old character defect of condemnation, listening to the lies of the enemy accusing me, was trying to make a comeback.

I was thinking to myself, “What in the world is going on?” Any one of these scenarios in the past would have pushed me over the edge, and I would have reacted badly or taken on rejection. Or my people pleasing would have kicked in and I would have scrambled around trying to make things right.

But because of the work God has been doing in my life over these 17 years, I am able to see with my spiritual eyes what is going on.

I am so grateful God healed my rejection wound and that I no longer yearn for the approval of man. I want my life to please God. I am grateful there is no condemnation to them who are in Christ Jesus (ref. Romans 8:1).

The accuser has no dominion over me. The Word of God has set me free, and the Holy Spirit protects me from the fiery darts of the enemy.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)

I am so thankful to God for equipping the called. If God calls you to something, be confident that He will give you everything you need to succeed.

Questions to take to heart:

  1. What kind of spiritual warfare have you been experiencing lately?
  2. Have you noticed a pattern? When are you most vulnerable to the enemy’s attacks?
  3. How can we pray for you?

I pray this topic has been helpful for you. Please reach out if you need to talk or need prayer. Email me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

You are loved,
Toni

Our Dashed Dreams

Our Dashed Dreams

Our Dashed Dreams
by Toni Weisz/Spiritual Disciplines

 

Scripture References

Jeremiah 29:11 (NKJV)
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Isaiah 61:7 (ESV)
Instead of your shame there shall be a double portion; instead of dishonor they shall rejoice in their lot; therefore, in their land they shall possess a double portion; they shall have everlasting joy.

I never imagined I would abort my first child. I grew up in a large Italian family. (My mom was one of ten children.) At our family get-togethers, there were always children running around. I was the oldest granddaughter, so it was my job to look after the younger ones so the adults could talk without interruptions.

I loved children, and I even thought about getting a teaching degree. What happened to my childhood dreams? How did I go so far off the path I thought would be my life?

Sin destroyed my dreams. I decided that being the “good, quiet one” wasn’t working for me anymore. I wasn’t getting the love and attention I needed, so I decided to take matters into my own hands—a true recipe for disaster.

At 12 years old, I started experimenting with alcohol and began sneaking shots of Scotch whiskey while my parents were at my brother’s football practices. My sister and I were left at home to do the dishes for a short while, but that’s all the devil needed—a little bit of time to get me alone and wanting.

My child-brain started thinking of ways to get my needs met but in unhealthy ways. This destructive path the enemy led me down was one of drugs, alcohol, numerous sexual partners, and then my abortion at 21. It was a dark and destructive journey. I hid in my secrets and was tormented by the devil.

How did I get here? One bad choice after another after another; it happens that fast.

I would continue in this self-destructive pattern for 22 years. Thankfully, God finally rescued me at the age of 34 when I heard the gospel for the first time. Jesus died on the cross for MY SINS. I had never heard that before. I desperately needed and wanted someone to take all my sins, shame, and guilt.

I needed a Savior—someone to love me just for me. I found all those things in a relationship with Jesus. I am so grateful for the love, forgiveness, and peace I found in Him.

God has turned my mourning into joy. He has given me a new name, a new life, and a new calling.

No matter what you have done in your past, God is able to forgive and redeem what the devil has stolen. You can still have a wonderful, fulfilling, God-glorifying life. It just may look a little different from your original plan. But rest assured, God is a good Father and has a good plan for your life.

Will you allow Him to help you dream new dreams?

 

Questions & Final Thoughts:

  1. What were some of your childhood dreams?
  2. Did the devil steal your dreams of having children and a family?
  3. How have you been able to move on and dream new dreams?
  4. How can we pray for you?

I pray that the Lord will minister to your broken heart and give you new dreams. Please reach out if you need a listening ear or a word of encouragement. Email: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

You are loved,
Toni

 

Read more of Toni's blogs HERE.