Post-Abortion Healing Through Resurrection Power

Post-Abortion Healing Through Resurrection Power

Post-Abortion Healing Through Resurrection Power

By Toni Weisz / Recovery Tools
Scriptures: Matthew 28:1-10 and 2 Corinthians 5:17

Easter is a story of Christ’s resurrection. (Read Matthew 28:1-10)

It also gives meaning to life rising from what seemed lost, of hope breaking through darkness, and of something new being born out of something that felt final.

But for many, seasons like Easter can feel complicated.

When your heart is carrying grief, regret, or quiet pain, it can be hard to fully connect with messages of joy and new life.

You may find yourself wondering:

“Can something in me really be made new?”
“Can God bring life out of this part of my story?”

The message of the resurrection of Christ answers with a gentle but powerful yes.

God Specializes in New Life

The resurrection of Jesus is more than a moment in history—it’s also a picture of what God does.

He brings life out of what feels dead.
He restores what feels broken.
He redeems what feels beyond repair.

In 2 Corinthians 5:17, we’re reminded:
“If anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”

That doesn’t mean your past disappears.

But it does mean your past does not have the final word.

When Your Heart Still Feels Heavy

After abortion, emotions can linger in unexpected ways.

Grief.
Shame.
“What ifs.”
Silent questions.

And sometimes it can feel like those things disqualify you from experiencing joy, peace, or closeness with God.

But the resurrection tells a different story. Jesus rose for broken, hurting, searching people.

He rose for you—right in the middle of your story.

Resurrection Doesn’t Ignore the Wounds

After Jesus rose, He still had scars.

They didn’t disappear—but they were no longer symbols of death.
They became evidence of victory and restoration.

In the same way, your story may always be part of you—but it does not have to be a place of shame.

Over time, through healing, it can become:

  • A place where God met you.
  • A place where growth began.
  • A place where life started to return.

Healing Is a Process of New Life

Resurrection isn’t always instant in how we experience it.

Sometimes it looks like:

  • A small moment of peace.
  • A shift in how you see yourself.
  • The courage to take one step toward healing.

New life often begins quietly.

But it grows.

And you don’t have to walk that process alone.

Being in a space where others understand—where healing is nurtured gently and without judgment—can make a meaningful difference. The My Ashes to Beauty Post-Abortion and Abuse Recovery Conference Call is helping women experience that kind of safe, compassionate restoration. You are invited to join us.

Your Story Is Not Over

Easter is a reminder that what feels like an ending is not always the end.

There is still life ahead.
There is still healing ahead.
There is still hope ahead.

God is not finished with your story. And even here—right in this place—new life can begin.

Your Thoughts?

What is one area of your heart where you long to experience new life or healing?

Please reach out if you would like to talk this week: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

You are loved,
Toni

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Idolatry and Codependency (Part 2)

Idolatry and Codependency (Part 2)

Idolatry and Codependency (Part 2)

By Toni Weisz/Recovery Tools

 

Scriptures: Philippians 4: 6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

 

Idolatry is the act of putting something or someone before God in our hearts or minds. Idols are obsessions that consume us. An idol can be a job, money, a sport or hobby, a relationship, or a physical problem; anything that we put before God.

I find myself at least once per year picking up the book by Suellen McDolly, “Codependency No More.” It’s a quick read chock full of great insight, tips, and reminders to help me stay on my side of the street. Lately, I find myself jumping in and trying to control outcomes and situations in order to keep my home life more stable and comfortable. I don’t like hearing harsh and judgmental comments from an individual, so I try to control what is said to that person so that I don’t have to hear those harsh comments.

What? When I stopped to think about it, I again realized I cannot control another person’s conversation. What was I doing? Huge red flags were waving before my eyes. I felt so convicted that I was getting too intertwined in an unhealthy way. The Lord brought this to my mind. And the next day as I was journaling, He let me know what I was doing was a sin, it’s unhealthy and destructive, and it will rob me of my peace and joy.

The bottom line is when I don’t trust God to take care of things, and I jump into control things, I am telling God I can do better and I don’t need Your help. He knows I am feeling anxious and fearful. Look at Abraham and Sarah; she jumped in ahead of God’s plan and made a mess of her life and even the world because of her sin of not trusting God. I don’t want to make that same mistake.

I used to try to save, rescue, fix, and help other people too much, and it was extremely unhealthy. It was something I learned from my home of origin; it helped me cope with things I had no control over. Now I see that I have to be very careful that I don’t fall into those unhealthy behavioral patterns.

Lord, I recognize that I was trying to control things for my benefit so I could have peace in my home. That is wrong. I need to trust You and relinquish control to You completely. I surrender all to You. I pray You increase my faith and trust in You and leave the outcomes to You. I pray for this family member to have a soft heart and a desire to be in Your word daily. I believe a lot of this would change if he would do that, but I cannot control that either. All I can do is be an example of someone who is running hard after You, Lord. Help me, Lord, to keep my focus on You and You alone.

Questions to take to heart:

  1. Are you fearful and anxious and trying to control things?
  2. What is God leading you to do?
  3. How can we pray for you?

Please reach out if you need to talk this week: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

To read Part 1 of Idolatry and Codependency:
https://myashestobeauty.com/idolatry-and-codependency-tonis-blog-abortion-recovery-and-abuse-support-group/

You are loved,
Toni

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A Time to Praise the Lord

A Time to Praise the Lord

A Time to Praise the Lord

by Toni Weisz/Recovery Tools

Scriptures: Joshua 4:6b-7, Revelation 12:11, Psalm 118:29, 28:7, 40:3, 150:6, and Isaiah 43:18-19

In the Book of Joshua, Chapter 4, we see God commanded the children of Israel to set up a memorial of remembrance for what He had done for them. These memorials were to be shared with future generations so they could see what amazing miraculous things God had done for them. I believe it is important for us to look back as well to see where we’ve come from and remember all the wondrous things the Lord has done for us.

Let’s look back over this past year, and let’s share all the wonderful things God has done for us and our families. There is power in our testimonies. We read in Revelation 12:11a, “And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.” Tell others the wondrous and amazing things that God has done for you. There is power in your testimony. We don’t know how our testimony can encourage someone else who is feeling hopeless, alone, and defeated. Your words can be the very thing they need to hear to encourage them and help them through a very dark time.

Let’s share some Scriptures that speak about our thanks to God for all His blessings.

Oh, give thanks unto the Lord, for he is good! For his mercy endures forever! Psalm 118:29

The Lord is my strength and my shield: my heart trusted in Him, and I am helped. Therefore, my heart greatly rejoices, and with my song I will praise Him. Psalm 28:7

And He has put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it and fear, and shall trust in the Lord. Psalm 40:3

But You are holy, enthroned in the praises of Israel. Psalm 22:3

Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Psalm 150:6

I could go on and on praising the Lord with more Scriptures that speak about His wonderful attributes and His great love for us, but now I would like to share a brief testimony.

God gave me this verse for 2025 from Isaiah 43:18-19, “Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth, shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”

In January, during a time of fasting and prayer, I started a new prayer journal, different from all previous years. I was desperate to hear from God, and we needed Him to move mightily on the behalf of my family. I wrote down 20 petitions with Scriptures for each one. I thanked God in advance for answering my prayers, and I signed my name and dated each one.

Slowly over the past year, God has answered many of my petitions which has been so humbling and has brought me to tears. In September, my son was strong enough to travel on an airplane with his wife to see my parents. He finally received a diagnosis on October 10, 2025, for the illness he’s had for four years.. My daughter, a single mom, has been blessed financially with a new job that started on November 9, 2025. God provided me with a part-time job this Wednesday, November 12, 2025.

In the ministry, we did two STS post-abortion studies and two Overcomers abuse studies. God raised up an army of godly courageous facilitators to help with our Bible studies this year. Thank you, ladies, for that. We’ve had 19 women on the call this year, which was our highest number ever. We just celebrated our 12th year of conference calls. We have over 3000 people from all over the world visit our website monthly. We had the opportunity to share our ministry at several churches and events here in Palm Beach, FL, in VA and NC. On Saturday, November 8, 2025, Grace and her new husband, Matthew, were at Love Life’s 40th week and she shared her miraculous redemption story. Matthew is the father of her aborted baby. Seven years after the abortion, they married on October 24, 2025.

God has given us at My Ashes to Beauty the distinct honor to walk with women who have felt all alone and tormented by the evil one. They come into our safe community and they feel the love of Jesus in our actions and words. God’s Holy Spirit is present on our conference calls and in our Bible studies. His fingerprints are all over this ministry, because it is His.

Please share a Scripture verse and a brief testimony about 3-5 minutes of what God has done in your life this year. We want to praise the Lord and thank Him for His abundant blessings.

To those who’ve been on the conference calls and also those reading online, thank you. I am so grateful to God for all of you.

I wish you and your families a very Blessed Thanksgiving.

You can reach out to me via email at:
toni@myashestobeauty.com

You are loved,
Toni

 

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The Root of Bitterness

The Root of Bitterness

The Root of Bitterness

By Toni Weisz/Spiritual Disciplines

Scriptures: Hebrews 12:14-15, Ephesians 4:26-27, 31 and James 5:16a

Hebrews 12:14-15
Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by this many become defiled;

Ephesians 4:26-27, 31
Be angry and sin not: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking put away from you with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

James 5:16a
Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.

Have you ever struggled to forgive someone, and it seems like a hundred times a day you keep thinking about all the bad things they said and did to you. Each time you bring them to the Lord and forgive them, but it’s not working. The evil one keeps bringing all these offences into your mind and heart and he is tormenting you with them. You try to forgive them the best you can, but for some reason, it is not working. I had that happen to me recently.

When I journal in the morning to the Lord, I ask Him to reveal any blindness or secret sins that I am not aware of so they can be brought into the light. Each morning, I read The Bible for Hope by AACC (American Association of Christian Counselors). Each morning, I read a different topic and the Scriptures that go with it. One morning, I was reading about bitterness. The Lord removed my blindness in this area, and He showed me I was jealous and envious of my family, and because of that, I could not forgive them. I first needed to confess my sins to God and then ask Him to remove this huge root that had been growing for 30 years. He had to do major surgery on my heart because this thing was huge. After all, He is the Great Physician (I couldn’t resist that, lol). I asked Him to remove this root and to replace it with His love, joy, and peace. And He did. It was done, no more struggling, no more playing old tapes, no more comparing their lives to mine. It was done. I was set free from my torment.

This root had prevented me from truly loving my family the way Christ wanted me to; instead I felt like a martyr. I was the poor little thing. That was a lie. God plucked me out of my family of origin, and I was adopted into God’s family. They don’t know the Lord. They are scrambling, trying to hold onto everything this world can give. I, on the other hand, have an incorruptible inheritance that no one can take away. No one can pluck me out of the Father’s hand. I have eternal security, which is more valuable than anything else this world can offer me.

I no longer yearn to be accepted by them. I don’t need to feel like I belong, because I know I belong to God and His Son has covered all my sins. My life has been redeemed from destruction; He crowns me with loving kindness and tender mercies. I am a daughter of the King. And that’s just fine with me.

Questions to take to heart:

  1. Do you struggle with forgiving others for what they have done to you in the past?
  2. Has it created a root of bitterness?
  3. Ask God to show you what is preventing you from truly loving and forgiving them.
  4. How can we pray for you?

I pray that you too can be set free from the chains of unforgiveness and bitterness. If you need to talk, just email me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

You are loved,
Toni

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My Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

My Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

My Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

by Toni Weisz/Abuse Recovery

Scriptures: Hebrews 13:5c, Romans 12:1-2, John 8:31-32 and Zephaniah 3:17

Romans 12:1-2
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is good and acceptable perfect will of God.

John 8:31-32
Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed Him, “If you abide in my word, you are my disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”

Coping mechanisms are defined as techniques we use to help us cope with the stress, pain, and trauma we have experienced in our lives.

Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms:

  • Avoidance and Isolation
  • Drugs and Alcohol
  • Denial
  • Busyness
  • Rationalization
  • Control

From my childhood, I learned avoidance and isolation to keep me safe from unhealthy people or situations. Running and hiding is what I learned as a small child, and I still used those tactics as an adult until I got into recovery and learned new healthy coping mechanisms. Praise God!

Instead of avoidance, God gave me a voice, and I learned to communicate my likes and dislikes. I never developed a voice growing up, but once I put up boundaries, using my voice was necessary to communicate those boundaries to others. As time went by, I felt more comfortable sharing my heart with others without fear of rejection. God also told me to stop running and hiding and to leave the outcome to Him.

I started using alcohol and drugs at 12 years old when I was not getting the healthy attention I needed at home. I decided to start taking matters into my own hands, which was a defining moment in my life. As a result of that choice, I would run to other things other than God when I was hurting. I just wanted a quick fix to avoid the pain I had accumulated all my life. I used people and allowed them to use me. My life was filled with regret, fear of rejection, depression, suicidal thoughts, and self-hatred. I thank God for having mercy on this broken woman. He saved me from my self-destructive lifestyle. I now run to Jesus to take my pain away. He is the only one who will never leave me nor forsake me (Ref. Hebrews 13:5c).

I was in denial about the dysfunction in my home of origin and my home with my husband and children for many years until I realized I cannot control another person and that doing anything out of fear never ends well. I don’t have the power to change another person; only God does. So, I relinquish control to God to change others or situations when I feel powerless. I was in denial due to my fear of rejection from my parents and spouse, so I obeyed ridiculous rules to be accepted and loved by others, but that never worked. When I finally received the love of Jesus in my heart, then I had the courage to stand on my own without fear of rejection from others because I knew God was with me, always.

Busyness was a tool the enemy used on me for decades. His purpose was to keep me so busy that I would not have time to recognize my dysfunctional life. My striving for love and acceptance, even from God, kept me working so hard to feel worthy. I never stopped long enough to evaluate my life, my choices, my relationships, my unhealthy view of myself, God, and others. I was so messed up, but I could not see that until God showed me my ways were not working.

Back in 2010, I was so depressed I asked God to take me home because I just wanted to die. And He said, “Do you believe I can turn things around for your good?”

I said, “Yes, Lord, I believe that.”

He said, “TRUST ME.”

After that, I got into ACA recovery work and an inner healing group for five years. God was exposing the lies with His truth. I was learning about boundaries and what that looks like, and He showed me that I was enabling abuse from others by not using my voice. God had me stop from all serving at church and First Care because I was that sick and needed God to intervene to heal me. God was so faithful and put the right people in my path, and I was healed and set free from all the dysfunction in my life and started experiencing true peace and freedom in Christ. In January 2013, I started this ministry. Praise Him!!! Thank you, Jesus.

I rationalized my abuse, thinking I must not be a person of value or else others would treat me differently. After my abortion, the enemy told me I deserve to be abused because of my decision to abort my child. My husband was very controlling, and my children and I were required to obey ridiculous rules. I rationalized in my head that if I didn’t obey those rules, he would leave me. The enemy used that lie for decades to keep me in bondage and in a very unhealthy home environment. I am thankful for the day I had courage to say, “No, I am not going to follow these rules,” and leave the outcome in God’s hands.

I was no longer fearful of him leaving. I trusted God to take care of me, and He did. My relationship with my husband now is better than it ever has been. I now know that I am loved and valued by God and that He doesn’t want me to accept abusive treatment from anyone; I don’t deserve to be abused regardless of my poor choices in the past. He loves me and wants me to use my voice to put up healthy boundaries and to protect myself from unhealthy people and situations. I cannot change my past. All I can do is learn from it and share my experience, strength, and hope with others so perhaps they can make healthy choices.

Control was a tool I learned to use when I was very young. I honestly believed I could control how others feel, what they do, and that I could control the outcome. That all was a lie. I had no control over any of those things. Areas I tried to control were how people reacted and behaved toward me. I tried to control what others saw in me by wearing a mask, and I also tried to control how much I weighed by taking speed, diet pills, and purging after I ate too much. God showed me by relinquishing control to Him that I can be set free from these obsessions and torment. He taught me to love myself just the way I am and to relinquish all control to Him because He will never harm me.

I am so grateful for the day I was set free from all my unhealthy coping mechanisms. I have learned new skills to help me cope with the pain and trauma from my past. I had to completely surrender everything and everybody to God. I no longer cared about what others thought of me. I didn’t obey ridiculous rules out of fear of being rejected, I now had a voice, and God has taught me how to use it to express my feelings in a healthy godly way. I am no longer in bondage to my old thinking and my old behavior patterns. I truly have become a new creation in Christ, with God’s help and by renewing my mind daily.

In Romans 12:2, the Bible says do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

Daily time spent with God in His Word and listening to the Holy Spirit has helped me to move out of the chaos, dysfunction, and misery into a peaceful, joyful, and fulfilling life.

Questions to take to heart:

  1. What have you used in the past to help you cope with the trauma you have experienced in your life?
  2. How did you break those unhealthy destructive behaviors?
  3. What are some healthy things you do now to help you cope in a godly way?
  4. How can we pray for you?

I pray this topic has been helpful for you. Please reach out if you need to talk: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

I will leave you with one of my favorite verses:
Zephaniah 3:17
The Lord your God in your midst, the mighty One will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.

You are loved,
Toni

 

 

Read more of Toni's blogs HERE.