Idolatry and Codependency (Part 2)
Idolatry and Codependency (Part 2)
By Toni Weisz/Recovery Tools
Scriptures: Philippians 4: 6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Idolatry is the act of putting something or someone before God in our hearts or minds. Idols are obsessions that consume us. An idol can be a job, money, a sport or hobby, a relationship, or a physical problem; anything that we put before God.
I find myself at least once per year picking up the book by Suellen McDolly, “Codependency No More.” It’s a quick read chock full of great insight, tips, and reminders to help me stay on my side of the street. Lately, I find myself jumping in and trying to control outcomes and situations in order to keep my home life more stable and comfortable. I don’t like hearing harsh and judgmental comments from an individual, so I try to control what is said to that person so that I don’t have to hear those harsh comments.
What? When I stopped to think about it, I again realized I cannot control another person’s conversation. What was I doing? Huge red flags were waving before my eyes. I felt so convicted that I was getting too intertwined in an unhealthy way. The Lord brought this to my mind. And the next day as I was journaling, He let me know what I was doing was a sin, it’s unhealthy and destructive, and it will rob me of my peace and joy.
The bottom line is when I don’t trust God to take care of things, and I jump into control things, I am telling God I can do better and I don’t need Your help. He knows I am feeling anxious and fearful. Look at Abraham and Sarah; she jumped in ahead of God’s plan and made a mess of her life and even the world because of her sin of not trusting God. I don’t want to make that same mistake.
I used to try to save, rescue, fix, and help other people too much, and it was extremely unhealthy. It was something I learned from my home of origin; it helped me cope with things I had no control over. Now I see that I have to be very careful that I don’t fall into those unhealthy behavioral patterns.
Lord, I recognize that I was trying to control things for my benefit so I could have peace in my home. That is wrong. I need to trust You and relinquish control to You completely. I surrender all to You. I pray You increase my faith and trust in You and leave the outcomes to You. I pray for this family member to have a soft heart and a desire to be in Your word daily. I believe a lot of this would change if he would do that, but I cannot control that either. All I can do is be an example of someone who is running hard after You, Lord. Help me, Lord, to keep my focus on You and You alone.
Questions to take to heart:
- Are you fearful and anxious and trying to control things?
- What is God leading you to do?
- How can we pray for you?
Please reach out if you need to talk this week: toni@myashestobeauty.com.
To read Part 1 of Idolatry and Codependency:
https://myashestobeauty.com/idolatry-and-codependency-tonis-blog-abortion-recovery-and-abuse-support-group/
You are loved,
Toni
Back to BLOGS
Prayer That Moves Mountains
Prayer That Moves Mountains
By Toni Weisz/Spiritual Disciplines
Scriptures: Mark 11:22b-24, Psalm 37:8c, 4-5, 1 Thessalonians 5:17, and Philippians 4:4-5a
We are starting a new year. I am challenging all of us to pray and ask God to give us a word or some Scriptures for this year. What is your word for this new year? Mine is, “Enter Into Your Rest.” The Scriptures are found in Mark 11. As many of you know, my son has been suffering with an unknown illness for many years. My daughter-in-law has also had some extremely troubling illnesses, and my daughter is a single mom basically raising my granddaughter on her own. I have been running hard after God all of 2025, and God has moved mightily and has answered many of my petitions, but there is still more to be done.
In my journalling time with the Lord on January 1, 2026, here is what the Holy Spirit told me:
“Little Bird, you are entering a new season. You are crossing over the Jordan onto dry land to finally enter into the promised land. The land flowing with milk and honey and abundant blessings. You have been wandering in the desert for many years. I have worked in all your lives and hearts and now, ‘Enter Into Your Rest.’ No more striving, no more fear, and no more anxiety. Do not fret; it only causes harm (Psalm 37:8c). Make Me your first thought in the morning. Make Me your priority. I am your great reward. Seek Me with your whole heart, mind, body, and soul. You have been laboring for so long; you need rest—rest for your weary soul.”
Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He will bring it to pass. (Psalm 37:4-5)
“Have faith in God. For assuredly I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be removed and be cast into the sea’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says. Therefore, I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them and you will have them.” (Mark 11:22b-24)
I am watching God’s promises unfold, and I am so much looking forward to a year of miracles. I want to have faith to move that mountain. I will be praying for this with my whole being and believing God will go before us and will fight our battles. He will provide, and He will lead us with His righteous right hand.
I pray you are also inspired to ask God for the impossible. God spoke in Genesis Chapter 1 and all of creation came into existence. If He can impregnate a virgin with the Son of God and raise Him from the dead after 3 days, God can answer your prayers, too. We just need faith to believe.
Questions to take to heart:
- What is your word and verse for this year?
- What things are you asking God for?
- How can we pray for you?
I believe in my heart that this year 2026 is going to be our best year ever. God will move mountains, save the lost, heal the broken hearted and bind up their wounds. He will set the captives free, and He will turn our ashes onto something beautiful for our good and His glory!!!
Please reach out if you need to talk: toni@myashestobeauty.com.
You are loved,
Toni
P.S. I want to challenge us all to pray without ceasing and to rejoice in the Lord always, again I say rejoice.
https://youtu.be/GVITQPGlI30?si=rkpm1rchU0k_oBU5
Crowder “Somebody Prayed” (Official Music Video)
Back to BLOGS
A Time to Praise the Lord
A Time to Praise the Lord
by Toni Weisz/Recovery Tools
Scriptures: Joshua 4:6b-7, Revelation 12:11, Psalm 118:29, 28:7, 40:3, 150:6, and Isaiah 43:18-19
In the Book of Joshua, Chapter 4, we see God commanded the children of Israel to set up a memorial of remembrance for what He had done for them. These memorials were to be shared with future generations so they could see what amazing miraculous things God had done for them. I believe it is important for us to look back as well to see where we’ve come from and remember all the wondrous things the Lord has done for us.
Let’s look back over this past year, and let’s share all the wonderful things God has done for us and our families. There is power in our testimonies. We read in Revelation 12:11a, “And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.” Tell others the wondrous and amazing things that God has done for you. There is power in your testimony. We don’t know how our testimony can encourage someone else who is feeling hopeless, alone, and defeated. Your words can be the very thing they need to hear to encourage them and help them through a very dark time.
Let’s share some Scriptures that speak about our thanks to God for all His blessings.
Oh, give thanks unto the Lord, for he is good! For his mercy endures forever! Psalm 118:29
The Lord is my strength and my shield: my heart trusted in Him, and I am helped. Therefore, my heart greatly rejoices, and with my song I will praise Him. Psalm 28:7
And He has put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it and fear, and shall trust in the Lord. Psalm 40:3
But You are holy, enthroned in the praises of Israel. Psalm 22:3
Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Psalm 150:6
I could go on and on praising the Lord with more Scriptures that speak about His wonderful attributes and His great love for us, but now I would like to share a brief testimony.
God gave me this verse for 2025 from Isaiah 43:18-19, “Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth, shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”
In January, during a time of fasting and prayer, I started a new prayer journal, different from all previous years. I was desperate to hear from God, and we needed Him to move mightily on the behalf of my family. I wrote down 20 petitions with Scriptures for each one. I thanked God in advance for answering my prayers, and I signed my name and dated each one.
Slowly over the past year, God has answered many of my petitions which has been so humbling and has brought me to tears. In September, my son was strong enough to travel on an airplane with his wife to see my parents. He finally received a diagnosis on October 10, 2025, for the illness he’s had for four years.. My daughter, a single mom, has been blessed financially with a new job that started on November 9, 2025. God provided me with a part-time job this Wednesday, November 12, 2025.
In the ministry, we did two STS post-abortion studies and two Overcomers abuse studies. God raised up an army of godly courageous facilitators to help with our Bible studies this year. Thank you, ladies, for that. We’ve had 19 women on the call this year, which was our highest number ever. We just celebrated our 12th year of conference calls. We have over 3000 people from all over the world visit our website monthly. We had the opportunity to share our ministry at several churches and events here in Palm Beach, FL, in VA and NC. On Saturday, November 8, 2025, Grace and her new husband, Matthew, were at Love Life’s 40th week and she shared her miraculous redemption story. Matthew is the father of her aborted baby. Seven years after the abortion, they married on October 24, 2025.
God has given us at My Ashes to Beauty the distinct honor to walk with women who have felt all alone and tormented by the evil one. They come into our safe community and they feel the love of Jesus in our actions and words. God’s Holy Spirit is present on our conference calls and in our Bible studies. His fingerprints are all over this ministry, because it is His.
Please share a Scripture verse and a brief testimony about 3-5 minutes of what God has done in your life this year. We want to praise the Lord and thank Him for His abundant blessings.
To those who’ve been on the conference calls and also those reading online, thank you. I am so grateful to God for all of you.
I wish you and your families a very Blessed Thanksgiving.
You can reach out to me via email at:
toni@myashestobeauty.com
You are loved,
Toni
Back to BLOGS
The Root of Bitterness
The Root of Bitterness
By Toni Weisz/Spiritual Disciplines
Scriptures: Hebrews 12:14-15, Ephesians 4:26-27, 31 and James 5:16a
Hebrews 12:14-15
Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by this many become defiled;
Ephesians 4:26-27, 31
Be angry and sin not: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking put away from you with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.
James 5:16a
Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.
Have you ever struggled to forgive someone, and it seems like a hundred times a day you keep thinking about all the bad things they said and did to you. Each time you bring them to the Lord and forgive them, but it’s not working. The evil one keeps bringing all these offences into your mind and heart and he is tormenting you with them. You try to forgive them the best you can, but for some reason, it is not working. I had that happen to me recently.
When I journal in the morning to the Lord, I ask Him to reveal any blindness or secret sins that I am not aware of so they can be brought into the light. Each morning, I read The Bible for Hope by AACC (American Association of Christian Counselors). Each morning, I read a different topic and the Scriptures that go with it. One morning, I was reading about bitterness. The Lord removed my blindness in this area, and He showed me I was jealous and envious of my family, and because of that, I could not forgive them. I first needed to confess my sins to God and then ask Him to remove this huge root that had been growing for 30 years. He had to do major surgery on my heart because this thing was huge. After all, He is the Great Physician (I couldn’t resist that, lol). I asked Him to remove this root and to replace it with His love, joy, and peace. And He did. It was done, no more struggling, no more playing old tapes, no more comparing their lives to mine. It was done. I was set free from my torment.
This root had prevented me from truly loving my family the way Christ wanted me to; instead I felt like a martyr. I was the poor little thing. That was a lie. God plucked me out of my family of origin, and I was adopted into God’s family. They don’t know the Lord. They are scrambling, trying to hold onto everything this world can give. I, on the other hand, have an incorruptible inheritance that no one can take away. No one can pluck me out of the Father’s hand. I have eternal security, which is more valuable than anything else this world can offer me.
I no longer yearn to be accepted by them. I don’t need to feel like I belong, because I know I belong to God and His Son has covered all my sins. My life has been redeemed from destruction; He crowns me with loving kindness and tender mercies. I am a daughter of the King. And that’s just fine with me.
Questions to take to heart:
- Do you struggle with forgiving others for what they have done to you in the past?
- Has it created a root of bitterness?
- Ask God to show you what is preventing you from truly loving and forgiving them.
- How can we pray for you?
I pray that you too can be set free from the chains of unforgiveness and bitterness. If you need to talk, just email me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.
You are loved,
Toni
Back to BLOGS