Fear of Surrender

Fear of Surrender

Fear of Surrender

November 13, 2021

Fear: Panic flight, causing of fear, terror (Strong’s Greek)

Surrender: Given out or over, surrendered, delivered (Strong’s Greek)

Scriptures

2 Timothy 1:7

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

Psalm 25:20

“Keep my soul, and deliver me; let me not be ashamed, for I put my trust in You.”

Psalm 27:1-14

“1 The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

2 When the wicked came against me to eat up my flesh,

my enemies and foes

They stumbled and fell.

3 Though an army may encamp against me,

my heart shall not fear;

though war may rise against me,

in this I will be confident,

4 One thing I have desired of the Lord,

that will I seek:

That I may dwell in the House of the Lord

All the days of my life,

To behold the beauty of the Lord,

and to inquire in His temple.

5 For in the time of trouble

he shall hide me in His pavilion;

In the secret place of his Tabernacle

He shall hide me;

He shall set me high up on a rock.

6 And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me;

Therefore I will offer sacrifices of joy to His Tabernacle;

I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord.

7 Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice!

Have mercy also upon me, and answer me.

8 when you said, “Seek My Face,”

My heart said to You, “Your face, Lord, I will seek”

9 Do not hide your face from me;

Do not turn your servant away in anger;

You have been my help;

Do not leave me nor forsake me.

Oh God of my salvation.

10 when my father and my mother forsake me,

Then the Lord will take care of me.

11 Teach me your way, O Lord,

And lead me in a smooth path, because of my enemies.

12 Do not deliver me to the will of my adversaries;

For false witnesses have risen against me,

And such as breathe out violence

13 I would have lost heart, unless I had believed

That I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

14 Wait on the Lord;

Be of good courage,

And He shall strengthen your heart;

Wait, I say, on the Lord!

When I say “fear of surrendering,” I’m not talking about our salvation. I’m talking about the things that we still hold onto that prevent us from completely surrendering our lives and will to Jesus.

Why do I still try to control my life, circumstances, and relationships? Why do I rely on myself instead of God?

Fear of surrender says that I believe that my way is better than God’s and that I trust myself more than the Lord to protect me, provide for me, and decide what’s best for me. It says that I am my own god.

When I am focused on my wounds from my past, I am not looking to Christ or to the liberty I now live in as His daughter.

Galatians 5:1 says “Standfast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage.”

Surrendering is a daily choice. Instead of surrendering to Jesus, am I running to activities or behaviors that will harm me and hold me back from freedom in Him? If so, what are those things?

Do I run to any detrimental outlets including or similar to the following?

  • Overeating, undereating, or obsessively controlling what I eat
  • Relationships that feed my negativity
  • Gossip
  • Judgment of others and having a critical spirit, which prevent me from recognizing my shortcomings and working on myself
  • Control of people and my environment (e.g., being a hover mother, bossing around spouses or friends)
  • Not trusting God to handle a situation and outcome for a friend or loved one
  • Obsessive cleaning and/or organizing
  • Substance abuse (e.g., of alcohol and/or drugs)
  • Compulsive shopping
  • Failing to take care of myself
  • Overexercising
  • Busyness in the name of God
  • Overworking or being overly career oriented
  • People pleasing instead of God pleasing

The fear of surrender is a demonic spirit to which we give opportunity for entry into our lives by not staying steadfast in our walks with God, not staying in the Word and renewing our minds, running to sin, and not keeping our eyes on Jesus.

Questions

  1. What things or old habits do you still run to that are preventing you from fully living a life surrendered to Christ today?
  2. What do you do to protect your mind and stay focused on the freedom that Christ has given you?
  3. Choose a scripture that you can memorize and speak out loud when you are struggling with surrendering a specific situation to God or ending an old habit. Please share it with the group.
  4. What specific thing can we be praying for you to be delivered from today?

 

God’s Beloved 1 John 3:2

 

Familiar Bondage

Familiar Bondage

I would rather go back to what is familiar, even if it is bondage…

Exodus 16:1-4a and John 3:16,

And they took their journey from Elim, and all the congregation of the children of Israel came unto the wilderness of Sin, which is between Elim and Sinai, on the fifteenth day of the second month after their departing out of Egypt. And the whole congregation of Israel murmured against Moses and Aaron in the wilderness: And the children of Israel said to them, “Oh that we had died by the hand of the Lord in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the pots of meat and when we ate bread to the full! For you have brought us out into the wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger.” Then the Lord said to Moses, “Behold I will rain bread from heaven for you….”

When the trials of the children of Israel were too hard for them to bear, they wanted to go back to what was familiar: bondage in Egypt. They wanted to be in control; they felt safe knowing what to expect.

How many of us can relate to wanting to go back to the dysfunctional relationships or sins of our past because there is comfort in knowing what to expect? Change is hard because it’s unfamiliar, and there is no safety or comfort in it. But God doesn’t want us to stay in our dysfunction. He wants us healed. He came to set us free from our bondage to sin. He wants us to trust Him completely with every area of our lives.

God provided the children of Israel with bread that literally dropped out of the sky. He called it Manna, “Bread from Heaven.” If God did that for them, don’t you think He can help you too? I think the answer is Yes!!!

What is the spiritual factor to consider when I want to be in control, instead of God being in control?

I am saying to God, “I don’t trust You. I don’t believe You are good. I don’t believe You care about me.”

So, what is the sin I am committing when I don’t trust God? The sin of unbelief.

Definition of faith in Hebrews 11:1 and 11:6: Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen. But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

Let me ask you, what are you still trying to control and refuse to release into God’s hands?

I learned at a very young age to take control of every area of my life; that, unfortunately, was not a good thing. A 12-year-old is not mature enough to take on such a responsibility. I controlled my voice but I did not use it. I controlled how I performed in school, sports, and in anything I set my mind to do by practicing until I could do something perfectly. When I was older, I controlled my weight by taking speed and diet pills and exercising excessively. I controlled what others perceived about me by wearing a mask to hide my true feelings and identity. It wasn’t until I felt safe to let God in that I was able to relinquish control to Him. By spending time in His Word, I began to understand the heart of God and discovered how much He loves us and wants us to be set free from our pasts, so we can live the abundant lives He came to give us. It’s by relinquishing control to God that we are set free. There is beauty in surrender.

Why are you not trusting God to help you in this area? What are you afraid of?

Relinquishing control was not a comfortable thing for me because I didn’t trust others not to hurt me. I became very self-sufficient and proficient in all I did. I had a huge wall around my heart that no one was going to penetrate, not even God. I grew up with a distorted view of God. I thought He was angry with me and would punish me if I was out of line, which is what I heard and saw as a child. Church was dark; people there spoke in another language, and the atmosphere was not warm and welcoming. So I associated these attributes with God. I felt He was dark, harsh, and unloving, which could not be further from the truth. I was fearful about trusting God because I was afraid of being hurt again. I didn’t know God’s heart toward me. When I got saved in 1994 and came across this verse from John 3:16, “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life,” I started believing that God does love me. And once I received His love into my heart and believed that He died for me on the cross, I started trusting Him more with my heart. But it was a long process. I am so grateful today for His love. That truth changed my life forever.

I had everything under control, so I thought, until my life and health started spiraling out of control. I couldn’t afford stuff anymore and my health was failing, my marriage was on the brink of divorce, and I didn’t know what to do. I was plagued with suicidal thoughts because I just couldn’t deal with my depression and self-loathing anymore, due to the sins from my past. This was not a life; it was a prison. I was just surviving because I needed someone to take my pain away, someone I could trust to love and accept me for who I was. Did such a person exist?

Dear One,

I want you to know that there is such a person who loves and accepts you for who you are. His name is Jesus, and He is the only one who will love you right where you are. He will never hurt you or force you to do something against your will. He is kind, loving, dependable, faithful, merciful, and forgiving. Jesus is your Savior and friend. Why not relinquish control of your life to God? Honestly, what do you have to lose at this point?

You are loved,

Toni

 

What is the spiritual factor to consider when I want to be in control instead of God being in control?

I am saying to God, “I don’t trust You (God). I don’t believe You (He) are good. I don’t believe You care about me.” So, what is the sin I am committing when I don’t trust God? The sin of unbelief.

Definition of faith in Hebrews 11:1 and 11:6: Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen. But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

 

Read more of Toni's blogs HERE.

The Woman with the Issue of Blood

The Woman with the Issue of Blood

Abortion Recovery Women’s Support Group (ARWSG)

The Woman with the Issue of Blood

Luke 8:43-48 (NKJV)
Now a woman, having a flow of blood for twelve years, who had spent all her livelihood on physicians and could not be healed by any, came from behind and touched the border (fringe) of His garment. And immediately her flow of blood stopped. And Jesus said, “Who touched Me?” When all denied it, Peter and those with him said, “Master, the multitudes throng and press You, and You say, ‘Who touched Me?’” But Jesus said, “Somebody touched Me, for I perceived power going out from Me.” Now when the woman saw that she was not hidden, she came trembling; and falling down before Him, she declared to Him in the presence of all the people the reason she had touched Him and how she was healed immediately. And He said to her, “Daughter, be of good cheer; your faith has made you well. Go in peace.”

We post-abortion women can relate to what this woman must have endured for so many years. We too know what it is like to spend all kinds of money on things that did not heal us. Some of us used drugs and alcohol to medicate ourselves from the pain we had stuffed for so long. Many of us went to doctors and therapists to help heal the damage that our abortions have done to us in so many areas of our lives. We know what it is like to suffer alone, to be isolated from others, and to feel hopeless and depressed. We were desperate for a cure but nothing worked, until we got to the point where we were tired of just existing and wanted the abundant life that Jesus promised we could have. It was when we had almost given up all hope that we encountered our Savior—Jesus, our healer. We risked it all, just to touch the hem of His garment because we knew if we did, then we would be healed. We risked exposure because we knew that only He could heal us.

It takes faith in God and courage to step out to touch Jesus’ garment to be healed. I pray God continues to guide you on this healing journey and that you become strong in the Lord, so we can bring more women into this ministry for healing. May we continue to be His hands and feet in this world.

Questions:

What are some of the things you tried in the past to help you cope with the pain of your abortion?
Alcohol and drugs were my escape from my pain. I was so tired of wearing a mask and pretending my life was perfect. After a while, I just couldn’t function well at all. My life was falling apart, my health was failing, and my marriage was on the brink of divorce. I was in a deep state of despair and depression. I just wanted to stop this torment of a life, but I couldn’t leave my 2 children without a mom. I was feeling hopeless and wanted to die until the day I met Jesus. He was so kind and loving to me. When I heard the gospel for the first time within 4 weeks, I ran to Jesus and kissed His feet and thanked Him for taking my pain away and for loving me. I never knew love like that before.

When did you finally have the courage to touch Jesus’ garment for healing?

In 2010, after suffering with severe depression again, I wanted to die. I was crying on my bed and said to the Lord, “I can’t do this anymore; can’t you just take me home?” I heard the Holy Spirit whisper, “Do you trust Me?” I said, “Yes Lord, I trust You.” “Do you believe that I can turn this around for good?” I said, “Yes Lord, I believe you can.” He said, “Then trust Me.” Immediately after that, I got the name of a ministry, and I started my recovery work for Adult Children of Emotionally Disconnected Families. It was a high-accountability, inner healing support group that I attended for 5 years, plus I attended weekly recovery meetings. This gave me tools and most importantly, I didn’t feel alone anymore. There were other women who struggled like I did. That started me on my healing from my past and all the unhealthy behavior I was tolerating from others. I learned boundaries, became strong, stood up to the bullies for the first time in my life, and used my voice. I learned to see myself the way God sees me and finally received His love into my heart. I have never been the same. Thank you, Jesus, for saving my soul and healing me.

Read more of Toni's blogs HERE.