Come to Jesus

Come to Jesus

Let us therefore come boldly onto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time
of need. (Hebrews 4:16)

I was fearful to speak up as a child, continually striving for perfection but never attaining it. I had an over developed sense of responsibility and would take on shame and guilt immediately for any wrongdoing. I also was a very anxious child; I was so worried about disappointing people or doing something wrong. Unfortunately, my parents were unaware of my drinking, drugs, and promiscuous behavior. I did a great job hiding that part of my life. But the truth was I suffered from depression as a teenager, and since my childhood, I felt I had no voice. I allowed others to manipulate and control me with their angry outbursts and their hurtful words. Because I was a child, I did not develop the skill of communicating in a healthy manner. In fact, I stuffed for so long that I could not stuff anymore. My rage and anger came out sideways. I had become a rage-aholic. I hated myself and thought I was not worthy to be loved and that I had no value to anyone; I felt invisible, alone, depressed, and hopeless. Especially after my abortion at 21, I thought I deserved to be abused because of my sins.

I came to personally know the Lord Jesus as my Savior and friend at the age of 34. I found in Him a Savior to take my sins away and a Friend who would love me just for me. I didn’t have to be perfect to be loved. It took me 15 years to truly take hold of and to believe in the inner most part of my being, that I was loved. How precious those words are to me. I am loved by God; I am not abandoned I am adopted into His family. I am not rejected. I am accepted.

Dear One, whatever you are fearful to share or even look at today, trust God and come boldly onto His throne of grace. He is lovingly calling you to come and lay down your burdens because you cannot carry them anymore; they are crushing you and are preventing you from truly being set free to enjoy this abundant life He has promised His children.

Let me ask you:

What are you struggling with today, is it a situation, or an individual?

Do you need to speak to someone and share your heart?

What is the Holy Spirit leading you to do or say?

The Lord wants us to be bold and courageous, what are you fearful of?

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

In His love and service,

—Toni

Read more of Toni's blogs HERE.
Freedom from Shame

Freedom from Shame

Freedom from Shame

by Toni Weisz/Spiritual Disciplines

Scriptures: Psalm 44:15-16, 2 Corinthians 10:4-5, Romans 12:2, Philippians 4:13 and Zephaniah 3:17

Psalm 44:15-16
My dishonor is continually before me, and the shame of my face has covered me, Because of the voice of him who reproaches and reviles, because of the enemy and the avenger.

I took on shame immediately as a child when I was harshly corrected by a perceived authority figure, like a parent, nun, or teacher. I would feel my cheeks get red, and I was filled with embracement and shame, especially if I was reprimanded in front of others. I suffered with an overdeveloped sense of responsibility; perfectionism and people-pleasing had made me vulnerable to the enemy’s attacks in this area.

Shame tells me from my home of origin, “It’s all your fault. You should have known better.” Another voice said, “I can’t believe you cannot follow simple instructions.” This was the remark by a substitute teacher in front of my entire third-grade class. I wanted to run and hide. I was so embarrassed.

When I got older, the shame would wash over me after a night of partying, when I would slowly start remembering things I did the night before. When I found myself unwed and pregnant, the enemy whispered, “Your parent’s will be so ashamed to call you, their daughter. They will disown and abandon you if they find out all the evil you are doing—the drugs, alcohol, sex, and now a baby out of wedlock. You will disgrace the family name. Take care of it now before someone finds out.”

The word picture I use to describe my shame is, I feel the weight of it pushing my head down, and I am covered by a heavy wet dark wool cloak. My head and body are bent over, my eyes are cast down, and my spirit is broken. I have feelings of despair, regret, and weakness. I feel all alone and isolated in this dark place. I feel hopeless and powerless to change my situation. All the while the enemy is tormenting me in this dark place. I don’t see any way out.

For those of you who suffered abuse by the hands of those who were supposed to protect you and then you were shamed into silence, the Lord’s heart broke for you that day and every day after that when the enemy abused you and then made you feel it was all your fault. That is a lie from the pit of hell. No one ever deserves to be mistreated or abused, ever. I pray the Lord heals all of your wounded areas and shows you how precious you are to Him.

I now recognize I don’t have to listen to those old tapes in my head anymore. God has given me a new identity, a new purpose, and a new life. Discovering who I am in Christ changed everything.

God showed me that shame is a choice. I can conquer it, and I can decide not to take it on. I have control over what I allow to enter into my thoughts.

The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 10:4-5, “For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.”

Our spiritual battles are won and lost in our minds. That’s why the Bible says to renew our minds daily with the Word of God. (Ref. Romans 12:2)

The enemy may try to get me to take on shame, but I have the final say. Christ in me helps me to make better choices. I am not a victim of my circumstances anymore. I am victorious in Christ.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)

I am loved by God.
I am adopted. I am not abandoned.
I am accepted. I am not rejected.
I belong to God, and I am His child.

Zephaniah 3:17
The Lord your God in your midst, the Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.

Questions to take to heart:

  1. Do you still take on shame?
  2. What does your shame feel like?
  3. Has God helped you to see yourself through His loving eyes?
  4. Who does God say you are?
  5. How can we pray for you?

Dear One, you are loved by God. We are here for you to help you conquer the lie shame tells you. Please reach out and email us at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

You are loved dearly,
Toni

 

 

Read more of Toni's blogs HERE.