Gracia asombrosa

Gracia asombrosa

Gracia asombrosa

by Toni Weisz/Abuse Recovery
Efesios 4:29-32 and Numbers 6:24-26

Efesios 4:29-32
Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ forgave you.

In the Moody Handbook of Theology, Paul Enns defines God’s grace as the unmerited or undeserving favor of God to those who are under condemnation. I did not grow up in a home where grace was displayed instead of harsh punishment. As a child, this caused me to be fearful and to hide.

I went to a church that was big and dark inside, and they spoke in a foreign language. The school associated with this church was very much the same. Students were hit with rulers when they disobeyed. Because I did not see grace and love in these formative places, I believed God was harsh and angry and ready to hit me when I got out of line. I began to believe that my faith in God was based upon my good works, e.g., If I am good, I will be loved and accepted, but if I disobey, I will be severely punished. Maybe that’s one of the reasons why I didn’t run to God when I was 21, unmarried, and pregnant. I was fearful that He too would judge me harshly and punish me severely.

During my adult life, I once again encountered a harsh church environment. My husband and I and our family started attending a legalistic church for several years where it was all about following the rules with no room for grace. The Holy Spirit in me was so grieved that I could barely feel or sense His presence.

At first, I didn’t recognize it, but I was experiencing spiritual abuse. Even so, I wanted to serve Jesus. If that meant wearing dresses 24/7 and obeying ridiculous rules, then that’s what I would do. This spiritual oppression greatly affected my soul, and I felt like I was slowly dying inside. Desafortunadamente, my children (who were in high school at the time) were also subjected to this spiritual abuse. I was so grateful when we finally got away from that toxic environment.

Similarly, I have experienced harsh treatment from another ministry leader as well. I felt like I could never do anything right and was always under a microscope. Every little thing I did was magnified and made into a public example. I was so embarrassed and felt discouraged. But God called me to the abortion recovery ministry, and I was not going to stop until God told me to.

Then one day, God brought a leader into my life who was kind and gentle. She gave me permission to just be me and fostered a safe environment in which I could open up and share about the emotional and spiritual abuse I was experiencing. I trusted her, and she truly encouraged me. It was so refreshing to have a leader that was sweet and kind, just like Jesus.

In our ministry, we want each woman to feel safe and know that she can share her story without judgement. We encourage her to use her voice, perhaps for the first time in her life. We want her to see the love of Jesus in our words and our actions. God wants our words to speak hope and life into the lives of the women He brings to our ministry, and that is what we will always try to do.

God has given us His heart for these courageous women. We are honored to walk alongside them on their healing journeys. You too are welcome here, courageous woman. Come as you are; we are waiting for you.

Pensamientos de cierre
What is grace? Grace is a gift from God; it cannot be earned.

Grace is overlooking someone else’s faults and loving them where they are.

I am so grateful for God’s overwhelming love and grace in my life. This grace compels me to love others, to extend mercy, and to be kind to all people. This grace humbles me when I think about what Jesus did for me on the cross…a gift I can never repay.

Number 6:24-26
“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you peace.”

 

Reflection Questions:

  1. Do you judge yourself or others harshly?
  2. Do others treat you harshly?
  3. Have you received God’s grace?
  4. Are you able to extend God’s grace to others?
  5. Cómo podemos orar por ti?

Por favor comuníquese si necesita hablar. You can email me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

Eres amado,
Toni

 

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El propósito de mi bebé

El propósito de mi bebé

El blog de Luci

Génesis 50:20: “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.”

II Peter 3:9: “The Lord is not slow to fulfill His promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.”

Growing up in my dysfunctional family, which included neglect and sexual, physical, and verbal abuse, did not equip me to care for or respect myself as I grew in the way God intended for me. I spent many years allowing others, especially men, to use and take advantage of me for sexual purposes. En el momento en que estaba 15, I was deeply wounded and hurting. My way of coping was to act out in self-destructive ways. As I mentioned earlier, I allowed others to use me. I also drank daily and experimented with most drugs, including mind-altering substances.

I had no hope that anything in my life would improve but that it would just continue to get worse until I died. I was so angry at the way I had been treated by my father and brothers but didn’t understand how to break out of this pattern of destructive behavior.

A la edad de 24, I slept with a man whom I hardly knew. De hecho, I couldn’t even tell you his name. All I know was that he said all the right things that my heart longed to hear: that he cared for me, really wanted to be with me, and made me feel special, even if it was just for a brief time. He kept insisting that we have sex, and I resisted at first but then gave in when he said he had a vasectomy, since that meant he could not get me pregnant.

I was desperate for this man’s attention but certainly didn’t want to have a baby with him! But like most of the men I opened my life up to, he had lied to me and much to my dismay, I became pregnant. I was devastated and felt a sense of desperation as to how I would “fix” this predicament I was in. Of course, the guy who said he cared so much about me left the scene as soon as he got what he wanted.

I confided in a friend that had introduced me to him. I remember that she had a 9-year-old daughter and no husband, and it was clear that she resented her daughter greatly by the way she treated her. She told me to “Get rid of it; you don’t want a kid!” All I could think about was how I didn’t want to end up like this woman, mistreating my own child! Entonces, against my better judgement and my conscience that told me “NO, this is wrong,” I chose to abort the only child I would ever conceive.

I cried every night when no one was around to see my pain. I cried for myself because of how empty this act made me feel, but mostly for this innocent child whose life I had taken so violently. I cried unconsolably, every night for months. Not knowing my Lord Jesus Christ at that time, I had no one to turn to for forgiveness and healing. As I look back on this desperate act of selfishness, I realize this was the final self-destructive thing that drove me into the arms of God! I just couldn’t live with the emptiness and pain anymore. Nine months after my abortion, I surrendered my life to Jesus, asked forgiveness for my sins, and began to walk in the newness of life that He offers to all who come to Him in humility.

I want to read a section of the letter to the baby I named Gabriella, which means “God is My Strength”:

Although your earthly life was so short, you impacted mine for eternity because precisely nine months after I allowed that abortion clinic to strip you away from my womb, I was born again! And on that amazing day, my heart, soul, and spirit were transformed from darkness and condemnation into the forgiving and precious light of Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit! God took our pain and ashes and turned them into eternal beauty!

I am pouring much of my life into other women who have experienced the pain and grief of abortion by helping them to acknowledge and heal from this event. I love you with all my heart, my precious little one, and I will see you soon!

Your forgiven Mom

 

What purpose did your unborn child serve in your life?

 

Did it move you towards God or away from Him?

 

Additional portions of letters to the unborn:

Amado, God knows your life was not a mistake. Your life spurred me to a deeper faith and a passion for Christ. God showed me grace, love, and healing in ways that I can’t describe. He used all these things for good (Rom 8:28). Your life allowed me to defend the defenseless, to value life in the womb, and to have compassion for the hurting moms who fell into the same trap as I did. God numbers our days and although yours were few, they continue to fuel my passion.

I, your mother, hold you in my arms today in a way I could not 10 years ago because I feared to look into your eyes and to hear God's voice speak through the gentle grasp of your fingers saying choose life.” In the light of my mind, I now behold you, my first child—the first of three girls. Do you know that you have two sisters? Do you know that your life has given great meaning to their lives? Because of you, I cherish the very breath of life God has gifted me and those whom I hold close to my heart.

As I embrace you today and always, I let go of shame, guilt, humiliation, rejection, abandono, pride, and pain. I reject the lies that once kept your memory hidden in darkness far from the light of truth. My love, my beautiful baby girl, you were never forgotten.

Heaven has documented each moment of your existence in the book of life. Ahora, it is time for me to write your page into the story of my life.

In the years to come, when we find ourselves reunited in the spirit, I will delight in the unfolding of your unique personality woven together with the experience of your brief, yet significant life. For now, sweetheart, I entrust your care and protection to the Father, whose plans for you are greater than either you or I can imagine.

Te llamé José porque lo que el enemigo pretendía para el mal, Dios se volvió para mi bien y para su gloria.. He exchanged my ashes into something beautiful. José, Inspiraste un ministerio llamado My Ashes to Beauty para ayudar a otras mamás a recuperarse de sus abortos pasados..

 

Bendiciones,

Luces

 

 

De regreso Blogs de Luci

Te veré otra vez

Te veré otra vez

“Te veré otra vez, una carta a mi bebe”

Revelación 21:4-5a
“Y Dios enjugará toda lágrima de sus ojos; no habrá más muerte, ni pena, ni llorar. No habrá dolor, porque las cosas primeras han pasado”. Entonces el que estaba sentado en el trono dijo, “He aquí, yo hago nuevas todas las cosas”.

John 14:3
Y si voy y os preparo lugar, Volveré y os recibiré conmigo mismo.; que donde estoy, allí puede que también estés.

I Corintios 2:9
Pero como está escrito, “El ojo no ha visto ni el oído ha oído, ni han entrado en el corazón del hombre las cosas que Dios ha preparado para los que le aman”.

Mi carta a mi bebé

Querido José,

mi precioso niño, Te he amado toda mi vida adulta., y sin embargo, Nunca he visto tu cara ni te he tenido en mis brazos. por eso, Lo siento mucho. Fuiste un regalo de Dios, y te tiré. Lamento mucho haber acabado con tu vida.. Dios me mostró cómo te ves. Vi a un joven de unos 30 años en un avión., y tenia cabello castaño rizado y ojos azules. Sentí que mi espíritu se aceleraba. Le susurré al Señor, "¿Es así como se ve mi hijo?"?“Sentí la confirmación en mi espíritu..

Te llamé José porque lo que el enemigo pretendía para el mal, Dios se volvió para mi bien y para su gloria.. Cambió mis cenizas por algo hermoso.. José, Inspiraste un ministerio llamado My Ashes to Beauty para ayudar a otras mamás a recuperarse de sus abortos pasados..

Sé que estás en el cielo con Jesús, un lugar donde no hay tristeza., dolor, o tristeza. No puedo esperar el día en que pueda verte cara a cara en el cielo donde estaremos juntos para siempre.. He imaginado esa escena una y otra vez en mi mente.. Te veo saludándome en el cielo. Yo te conozco y tu me conoces. nos abrazamos. Con lágrimas de alegría corriendo por mis mejillas, me besas y te digo, “He esperado este momento durante tanto tiempo.. Ahora nunca más nos separaremos. Te amo, José”. tu respondes, "Te amo, Mamá." Entonces, Miraré a Jesús y le agradeceré por este precioso regalo de reunirme con mi hijo en el cielo y por el regalo de la salvación que me dio..

te veré pronto.

amor siempre,
Mamá

Mientras oraba por el tema de hoy, esta cancion llego a mi estacion, Cicatrices en el cielo, por Fundición de coronas. Aquí algunas de las letras (al cual le hice algunas modificaciones menores):

Ahora lo que daría por un día más contigo. José (el nombre de su hijo o hijos).
Porque hay una herida aquí en mi corazón donde falta algo. Y me dicen que con el tiempo sanará. Pero sé que estás en un lugar mejor donde estás sano y completo y yo también lo estaré..
Las únicas cicatrices en el cielo, No nos pertenecerán a mí ni a ti..
No habrá nada roto, y todo lo viejo será hecho nuevo. Y ese pensamiento me hace sonreír ahora, incluso cuando las lágrimas caen. ¿Es que las únicas cicatrices en el cielo están en las manos que te sostienen ahora?.

Preguntas para tomar en serio:
¿Cuáles son tus pensamientos cuando piensas en tu bebé? (o bebes)? ¿Qué te gustaría decirle a tu bebé? (o bebes)?

Puedes leer más cartas en nuestra web: https://myashestobeauty.com/a-letter-to-my-baby/

Rezo para que esto bendiga tu corazón..

Eres amado,

Toni

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restaurado

I became involved in My Ashes to Beauty ministry many years after my abortion. As I walked through the healing process of having an abortion, I realized how much of the decisions leading up to that very day had been affected by my childhood trauma, neglect and the sexual abuse I experienced. I knew in my heart I had to go all the way back, to allow God to start this healing process.

In the fall of 2020, I had an opportunity to join a group of warrior women in a sexual abuse bible study called “In the Wildflowers”, via Zoom. I did my part by watching the weekly videos, doing my homework and meeting every Monday night. I had never really done any work in this area of my life. I had shared my situations with others, including counselors but it had been dismissed. As I began my healing journey, I was able to recognize how the trauma of abuse had followed me into adolescence and adulthood. Prior to this study I had felt that worse things had happened to other girls and I needed to ‘suck it up ’and get over it. I felt that the abuse I had suffered was “normal” and, I had done something to cause it. I carried the shame and guilt of what others had done to me and owned their sickness for so many years!

In this study, I found help and encouragement from the ladies who I met with every week in my class. They gave me the strength I needed to get through this journey. When I did not have words or the ability to identify how I felt; they showed up with words to help me express my heart from the pain and grief. When I was angry and felt defeated, they prayed and spoke God’s truth into my life. We encouraged each other through text messages and email throughout the week and we loved on each other, helping each other through our painful journeys.

This bible study, the love and support I received allowed years of pain, shame and guilt to be washed away. I was able to surrender the burden of other people’s selfishness and God allowed me to be set free, from my past and He healed me.

Now I am sharing my redemption story so you can be set free and live a victorious life. God’s word promises to restore us. “So, I will restore to you the years that

the swarming locust has eaten, the crawling locust, the consuming locust, and the chewy locust, my great army which I sent among you.” (Joel 2:25 NKJV) And that is exactly what He did for me and He’s waiting for you to start your healing journey of restoration.

 

Rhonda Bouchlas

 

 

Viernes Santo: Su vida por la nuestra

Viernes Santo: Su vida por la nuestra

Greater Love hath no man than this that a man lay down His life for his friends. John 15:13

Lucas 23:44-46 Now it was the sixth hour (noon) and there was darkness over all the earth until the ninth hour (3 PM). Then the sun was darkened, and the veil of the Temple was torn in two. And when Jesus cried out with a loud voice, “Father, into Your hands I commit My spirit.” Having said this, He breathed His last breath.

Mark 15:34 And at the ninth hour (3PM) Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani? Which is being interpreted, My God, Dios mío, why hast thou forsaken me?

I want us to reflect on the sacrifice that Jesus made on the cross for each one of us. We will never know the immense pain He experienced not only physically but spiritually. On the hours that Jesus hung on the cross from 12 noon to 3 PM the whole earth was darkened, and so was the sun. God had forsaken His only Son when He bore all the sins of the world on His body. Jesus cries out, “My God, Dios mío, why hast thou forsaken me?” The word forsake in the Merriam-Webster dictionary means to renounce or turn away from entirely. Holy God darkened the earth for 3 hours because He could not look upon Jesus when He bore our sins upon Himself. The Bible says that Jesus became sin for us, who knew no sin. I read a commentary that said God caused the darkness so humans could not look upon Jesus and see the turmoil and agony that He went through on our behalf. It was a sacred sacrifice that only the Father could see. This was His perfect Lamb of God who was sacrificed for the sins of the whole world.

At the same time the veil in the Temple, between the Holy of Holies, was torn from top to bottom. The very hand of God tore the veil, giving us access to God through Jesus His Son. Jesus was the new and living way for us to go to God, we no longer had to go through a Priest to make atonement for our sins. Jesus paid for our sins so we could have free access to the Father by Him. This gives us, you and me, access to God anytime day or night, that we need Him. That is so comforting to know.

Now think of all the sins you have ever committed, they are too numerous to count, yet all of them have been covered by Jesus’ shed blood on the cross, if you have received the gift of salvation through Jesus’ death on the cross for your sins. If you are born again, the Bible says you are a new creation in Christ, old things are passed away behold all things become new. (2nd Corintios 5:17)

It is good Lord, to be reminded of the miraculous work you did in me when I became born-again. Thank you for forgiving all my sins, my rebellious actions, my drunkenness, drug usage, fornication, my abortion, my lying, stealing, my pride and my idol worship. All these I lay at your feet Jesus. I no longer have to carry these sins on my back. You have exchanged my sins for your righteousness. I am so grateful to you Lord, the day you had mercy on this broken woman and opened my eyes to see that what I was doing was not working and I needed you in my life. I surrendered my will and my life to you and confessed my sins and asked Jesus to be my Lord and Savior. It was the most beautiful day of my life, Febrero 6, 1994. A day I will always cherish.

Preguntas:

What is the Holy Spirit bringing to your mind right now?

Primero, Are you born-again? Have you put your faith and trust in Jesus as your Lord and Savior? Have you asked Him to forgive all your sins?

Even after we are saved, we need to confess our sins daily to God. Is there anything the Lord is putting on your heart that you need to confess publicly?

What are you most grateful to God For?

I pray the Lord will bless you as you seek His wisdom and discernment in your life.

 

Eres amado,
Toni

 

 

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