El propósito de mi bebé

El propósito de mi bebé

El blog de Luci

Génesis 50:20: “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.”

II Peter 3:9: “The Lord is not slow to fulfill His promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.”

Growing up in my dysfunctional family, which included neglect and sexual, physical, and verbal abuse, did not equip me to care for or respect myself as I grew in the way God intended for me. I spent many years allowing others, especially men, to use and take advantage of me for sexual purposes. En el momento en que estaba 15, I was deeply wounded and hurting. My way of coping was to act out in self-destructive ways. As I mentioned earlier, I allowed others to use me. I also drank daily and experimented with most drugs, including mind-altering substances.

I had no hope that anything in my life would improve but that it would just continue to get worse until I died. I was so angry at the way I had been treated by my father and brothers but didn’t understand how to break out of this pattern of destructive behavior.

At the age of 24, I slept with a man whom I hardly knew. De hecho, I couldn’t even tell you his name. All I know was that he said all the right things that my heart longed to hear: that he cared for me, really wanted to be with me, and made me feel special, even if it was just for a brief time. He kept insisting that we have sex, and I resisted at first but then gave in when he said he had a vasectomy, since that meant he could not get me pregnant.

I was desperate for this man’s attention but certainly didn’t want to have a baby with him! But like most of the men I opened my life up to, he had lied to me and much to my dismay, I became pregnant. I was devastated and felt a sense of desperation as to how I would “fix” this predicament I was in. Of course, the guy who said he cared so much about me left the scene as soon as he got what he wanted.

I confided in a friend that had introduced me to him. I remember that she had a 9-year-old daughter and no husband, and it was clear that she resented her daughter greatly by the way she treated her. She told me to “Get rid of it; you don’t want a kid!” All I could think about was how I didn’t want to end up like this woman, mistreating my own child! Entonces, against my better judgement and my conscience that told me “NO, this is wrong,” I chose to abort the only child I would ever conceive.

I cried every night when no one was around to see my pain. I cried for myself because of how empty this act made me feel, but mostly for this innocent child whose life I had taken so violently. I cried unconsolably, every night for months. Not knowing my Lord Jesus Christ at that time, I had no one to turn to for forgiveness and healing. As I look back on this desperate act of selfishness, I realize this was the final self-destructive thing that drove me into the arms of God! I just couldn’t live with the emptiness and pain anymore. Nine months after my abortion, I surrendered my life to Jesus, asked forgiveness for my sins, and began to walk in the newness of life that He offers to all who come to Him in humility.

I want to read a section of the letter to the baby I named Gabriella, which means “God is My Strength”:

Although your earthly life was so short, you impacted mine for eternity because precisely nine months after I allowed that abortion clinic to strip you away from my womb, I was born again! And on that amazing day, my heart, soul, and spirit were transformed from darkness and condemnation into the forgiving and precious light of Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit! God took our pain and ashes and turned them into eternal beauty!

I am pouring much of my life into other women who have experienced the pain and grief of abortion by helping them to acknowledge and heal from this event. I love you with all my heart, my precious little one, and I will see you soon!

Your forgiven Mom

 

What purpose did your unborn child serve in your life?

 

Did it move you towards God or away from Him?

 

Additional portions of letters to the unborn:

Amado, God knows your life was not a mistake. Your life spurred me to a deeper faith and a passion for Christ. God showed me grace, love, and healing in ways that I can’t describe. He used all these things for good (Rom 8:28). Your life allowed me to defend the defenseless, to value life in the womb, and to have compassion for the hurting moms who fell into the same trap as I did. God numbers our days and although yours were few, they continue to fuel my passion.

I, your mother, hold you in my arms today in a way I could not 10 years ago because I feared to look into your eyes and to hear God's voice speak through the gentle grasp of your fingers saying choose life.” In the light of my mind, I now behold you, my first child—the first of three girls. Do you know that you have two sisters? Do you know that your life has given great meaning to their lives? Because of you, I cherish the very breath of life God has gifted me and those whom I hold close to my heart.

As I embrace you today and always, I let go of shame, guilt, humiliation, rejection, abandono, pride, and pain. I reject the lies that once kept your memory hidden in darkness far from the light of truth. My love, my beautiful baby girl, you were never forgotten.

Heaven has documented each moment of your existence in the book of life. Now, it is time for me to write your page into the story of my life.

In the years to come, when we find ourselves reunited in the spirit, I will delight in the unfolding of your unique personality woven together with the experience of your brief, yet significant life. For now, sweetheart, I entrust your care and protection to the Father, whose plans for you are greater than either you or I can imagine.

I named you Joseph because what the enemy meant for evil, God turned around for my good and for His glory. He exchanged my ashes into something beautiful. Joseph, you inspired a ministry called My Ashes to Beauty to help other moms heal from their past abortions.

 

Bendiciones,

Luces

 

 

De regreso Blogs de Luci

Soy la flor silvestre de Dios

Soy la flor silvestre de Dios

Blog de Luci

Fui parte del Estudio Bíblico de Recuperación del Abuso sexual con un pequeño grupo de mujeres a través del ministerio “My Ashes To Beauty”. Y cuando accedí a participar, Supuse que habían pasado tantas décadas desde que ocurrieron los abusos que no habría nuevos descubrimientos.. Bien, resulta que habia cosas que aun no habia procesado, incluso con todo el asesoramiento que tuve a lo largo de los años.

Tuve la oportunidad de llorar la pérdida de una infancia y una adolescencia seguras y felices que todas las niñas merecen experimentar.. Una de las cosas que realmente me conmovió fue cuando compartimos fotos del período de tiempo en que perdimos la inocencia.. Sentí tanta compasión por las fotos de las otras mujeres y lo preciosas y vulnerables que parecían en el momento de sus abusos.. Cuando miré mi foto, Sentí tanto amor y misericordia por la joven adolescente, ese fui yo; derramé lágrimas por eso. no me vi en ese entonces, la forma en que ahora lo hago. Me había culpado por los abusos y no podía ver más allá de cómo me definía.. En el transcurso de este estudio, recordé que soy la hija preciosa y adorada de Dios.! Y eso definitivamente fue algo bueno para permitir que se hundiera en mi corazón.!

A medida que conocí a las mujeres en este entorno íntimo y escuché sus historias, me di cuenta, no estoy solo en esto, que otros han experimentado atrocidades similares y me hizo querer por ellos. Nos unimos de una manera que va más allá de una típica reunión de grupo para orar o estudiar la Biblia.. Tuve la sensación de que Dios reunió a este grupo en particular para que pudiéramos orar por, animarnos y mostrarnos unos a otros que hay más curación y trabajo por hacer. Las oraciones que rezaron por nosotros fueron como un bálsamo curativo que se hundió profundamente en mi alma.!

La recuperación del abuso sexual lleva tiempo, a medida que quitamos las capas de creencias falsas y pensamientos negativos que nos mantienen en cautiverio y nos impiden avanzar más en el hermoso camino que Dios tiene para que cada uno de nosotros camine. No solo necesitamos seguir creciendo en Él, pero también quiere usarnos para mostrar a otros la sanidad y el perdón que les espera, a través de su amor. Este estudio fue un lugar seguro para compartir y ser vulnerable con mujeres de ideas afines..

su amada,

Luces

 

De regreso Blogs de Luci

Mi identidad en Cristo (Parte 1 & 2)

Mi identidad en Cristo (Parte 1 & 2)

El blog de Luci

Mi identidad en Cristo (Parte 1)

 

2 Corintios 5:17 “De modo que si alguno está en Cristo, él (ella) es una nueva creación. lo viejo ha fallecido; Mirad, lo nuevo ha llegado”.

Romanos 8:1 “Por tanto, ahora ninguna condenación hay para los que están en Cristo Jesús”.

John 15:15 “Ya no os llamo siervos, porque el siervo no sabe lo que hace su señor; pero os he llamado amigos, porque todo lo que he oído de mi Padre os lo he hecho saber”.

Cuando era una niña pequeña, Recuerdo haber tenido una sensación general de felicidad y libertad por ser niño.. Pero a medida que crecí y comencé a desarrollar la conciencia de mi identidad dentro de mi unidad familiar y me convertí en víctima de abuso verbal y físico., Mi perspectiva sobre quién era comenzó a cambiar..

En el ojo de mi mente, yo era feo, estúpido, y en general, una chica patética a la que nadie amaba ni quería estar. Recuerdo a mi padre diciendo una y otra vez, “¿Por qué no puedes ser como tu hermano o por qué no puedes ser como tu hermana?”?"Se refería a los hermanos mayores que habían seguido adelante y tuvieron éxito., en sus ojos. Por su frustración y su ira desenfrenada., atacó y nos hizo sentir indeseados mientras nos humillaba abusando de nosotros verbalmente.. Mi madre era una persona tranquila., mujer sumisa con multiples (Total de 15) niños para cuidar. Ella no estaba involucrada en nuestras vidas excepto para atender nuestras necesidades físicas.. Y los hermanos que todavía estaban en el hogar., Me trataron con gran desprecio y me golpearon regularmente.. A la edad 11, Estaba siendo abusada sexualmente por dos de mis hermanos mayores y cuando tenía 12, Perdí mi virginidad con un hombre drogadicto que era 14 años mayor, que vivia en el barrio. Literalmente se aprovechó de mi desesperada necesidad de amor y afecto y me convenció de cooperar con sus intenciones egoístas.. No se lo dije a nadie porque pensé que me culparían.; Creí en mi joven corazón que era mi culpa.

Me sentí como un fracaso, que cuando yo era un joven adolescente, Empecé a medicarme con vino y cerveza., y en un momento, Me sentí tan desesperado, Intenté quitarme la vida! Obviamente, no tuve éxito, pero en ese momento, Creí que era un fracaso incluso en eso.! No sólo me sentía indigno de ser amado sino que también me sentía sucio y tenía un gran sentimiento de vergüenza que me cubría como una espesa nube..

A medida que crecía en mi adolescencia, Continué abusando del alcohol, agregando licor fuerte y fue introducido a todo tipo de drogas ilegales, con el que experimenté a diario. Viví una vida destructiva de abuso de sustancias y promiscuidad.. y a la edad 24, Cometí lo que pensé que era un delito imperdonable al abortar., Básicamente, poner fin a la vida de lo que resultaría ser mi único hijo biológico.. Este evento me sumergió más profundamente en una sensación de autodesprecio y vacío que aún no había experimentado.. En el momento en que estaba 25, mi sentido de autoestima estaba en el hoyo; No tenía esperanza ni propósito para mi futuro..

Entonces sucedió! El Señor Jesús, que me había estado persiguiendo durante años a través del testimonio de otros seguidores de Cristo, Me abrió los ojos a su asombrosa aceptación., amor y misericordia para mi. Y puedo recordar la sensación de esperanza y amor que fluyó a través de mí como un río caudaloso.! Fue increíble! Mi autoperspectiva cambió ese día.. Me atreví a creer que podía ser algo más de lo que me había acostumbrado.. Y me embarqué en una misión de por vida para conocer al Dios que estaría dispuesto a morir por mí., un patético, pecaminoso, chica fea y estúpida. Fueron necesarios años de lectura de la Biblia., Apoyo de otros creyentes en Jesús y algo de asesoramiento bíblico., para mí aceptar mi nueva identidad mientras abrazaba 2 Corintios 5:17, que nos dice, “De modo que si alguno está en Cristo, él (ella) es una nueva creación. lo viejo ha fallecido; Mirad, lo nuevo ha llegado”.

Hoy, después de caminar con el Señor por más 37 años, tener su asombroso Espíritu Santo viviendo en mí, Acepto la verdad de que soy la preciosa hija de Dios., amado y apreciado más allá de mis sueños más locos! me ha dado dignidad, autoestima y una esperanza futura. Ya no me condeno porque según Romanos 8:1, “Por tanto, ahora ninguna condenación hay para los que están en Cristo Jesús”. Ya no acepto el intento de otros de manipularme o menospreciarme.. He llegado a comprender que puedo tener límites y mantener el control., por el poder y la guía del Espíritu Santo.

Bendiciones,

Luces

Ver Mi identidad en Cristo (Parte 2) abajo.

 

El blog de Luci

Mi identidad en Cristo (Parte 2)

 

PREGUNTAS:

cual es tu identidad? ¿En qué se diferencia de cuando conociste y recibiste a Jesús como tu Señor??

Mientras Jesús caminaba por la tierra, Enseñar y predicar sobre el Reino de Dios., Validó a las mujeres y les mostró gran misericordia y respeto.. Fue en contra de la cultura en la que vivían.. A diferencia de, su cultura los trataba como ciudadanos de tercera clase, con pocos derechos o respeto. El aceptó, curado, Los amé y les enseñé.. Y Él está disponible para hacer lo mismo por ti y por mí hoy.!

Según los romanos 8:17, aquellos que se han arrepentido de sus pecados y han recibido a Jesús como su Señor y Salvador, convertirse en sus herederos (que es aquel que recibe la propiedad de un inmueble y de todo lo que en él hay), pero en este caso, Estamos recibiendo el Reino de Dios en toda su asombrosa belleza y perfección.. Somos preciosas y amadas hijas del Rey y lo seremos por toda la eternidad.!

Quiero que te imagines vestido con un lujoso, túnica blanca que fluye, que es el símbolo de la pureza y la perfección, y leamos lo que dice en Isaías 61:1-3, que fue escrito 740-700 antes de Cristo (antes de que Jesús caminara por esta tierra).

“El espíritu del Señor Dios está sobre mí, porque el Señor me ha ungido para llevar buenas nuevas a los pobres; Me ha enviado a vendar a los quebrantados de corazón., proclamar libertad a los cautivos, y la apertura de la cárcel a los presos; para proclamar el año de gracia del Señor, y el día de la venganza de nuestro Dios; para consolar a todos los que lloran; para conceder a los que lloran en Sión – darles un hermoso tocado en lugar de cenizas, el aceite de alegría en lugar de luto, el manto de alabanza en lugar de un espíritu débil; para que sean llamados encinas de justicia, la plantación del señor, para que sea glorificado”. ESV

Dios toma nuestros trapos de inmundicia, que es un símbolo de nuestras vidas rotas, y Él los reemplaza con limpios, túnicas blancas o justicia, comodidad, cicatrización, alegría, paz y fuerza!

Isaías 61:10 “Mi alma se regocijará mucho en el Señor, mi alma se regocijará en mi Dios; porque me ha vestido con vestiduras de salvación, Me ha envuelto con manto de justicia, como el novio se adorna con una guirnalda y como la novia se adorna con sus joyas”.

Bendiciones,

Luces

De regreso Blogs de Luci

El Espíritu Santo: mi guía & Amigo

El Espíritu Santo: mi guía & Amigo

El blog de Luci

We receive this peace through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.

If we have given our lives over to Jesus and are following Him we have the very spirit of Jesus Christ living in us! He is always present, interceding and guiding us into truth and peace, in and out of the storm.

What is His purpose? It is that you will live with peace and joy in your heart, knowing that He loves you and nothing will come between you and Him, no matter the situation. It is that you will be made righteous, that you may display the gifts of His Spirit and show Him to a dying world.

Prayer is always God’s plan to connect us to Him but now more than ever, we need to be praying earnestly for God to draw us to Himself and praying about all that’s happening around us.

We have access to the very Spirit of Christ in His Holy Spirit who will intercede for us when we don’t know what to ask for!

~ Romans 8:26-28

“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groaning too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because[ the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

“Our prayers are not always answered by a specific action. Sometimes our prayers are answered with a shift in our attitude or in our emotions. After prayers we may find that confidence has replaced our fear, contentment has replaced our desire, hope has replaced our despair, comfort has replaced our grief, patience has replaced our frustration, joy has replaced our spirit of heaviness and love has replaced our anger. I know many of us are shaken by the events in the past few weeks so, let’s look at Isaiah and see how he coped:

When Isaiah’s life was shaken, he responded by looking up. Como resultado, he had a fresh vision of the Lord. This is the time to look up…from our knees! Let’s ask God to give us a fresh vision of Himself. Because, God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear… since He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust. Surely he will save you from…the deadly pestilence…You will not fear the terror of night…nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you…” Anne Graham Lotz

 

Bendiciones,

Luces

 

De regreso Blogs de Luci

Santidad para la vida humana

Santidad para la vida humana

El blog de Luci

As I write this, it is the 47th anniversary of Roe vs Wade when the US Supreme Court decided abortion will be “legal” in all 50 states.

Churches all across America recognize this 3rd Sunday in January each year, as Sanctity of Human Life Sunday. It is a day when we as believers, thank God for the gift of life, we remember those who have died as a result of abortion, and we commit ourselves to protect the unborn.

To give you an idea of where we are, here are some statistics:

From 1973 to 2017 more than 60 million lives have been lost to abortion.

Every year, an estimated one million abortions are performed in the US.

As many as 2,500 unborn babies lose their lives in abortions every day.

4 out of 10 women who choose abortion identify as Christians and are attending church at least once a month. The sad truth is, many of us have been affected by what has been promoted as a quick fix to an inconvenience. Some of us have personal experience, some have a family member or know someone who has had an abortion.

But we have been lied to by the enemy of our souls. In John 10:10, Jesus says, “The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” And the enemy has been involved in the killing of God’s children since the beginning of time.

Some of you may have hearts that are burdened with sins from your past. For some sins, it is harder for us to receive the forgiveness Christ offers than for others. Especially those sins committed against the body. Sexual sin and abortion are difficult to share and receive healing for because they touch us so deeply and there is great shame and stigma attached to them.

I am passionate about this because it has affected me personally. And I suffered so much for my choice! I was alone and afraid; I had no one in my young life that could speak truth to me. I was fed the lie that it wasn’t a baby and that I would be better off without it. For many months after the procedure, I was deeply depressed and felt empty inside over my decision; I cried every night. After being witnessed to over and over, I turned to the Lord Jesus for forgiveness because the burden was too heavy. He turned my life around and immediately forgave me. But I had to work through a lot of emotional struggles. I look back on that time and since the Lord showed me His forgiveness, over time I learned to let go of the guilt and shame I was holding on to and receive healing from the Lord through His Word and other believers.

The Lord exposed me to some compassionate and amazing Christians who were involved in the pro-life movement. And they helped me work through the fallout and heal to the point that I was able to minister to other hurting women who were alone in their secret suffering. It was a great relief to get rid of the burden of myself hate!

And the cross is open to all; the Lord receives all that ask for His forgiveness. There is healing available for grieving hearts that regret their involvement in abortion. It is not the unforgivable sin. Our Savior went to the cross for all sins.

When our hearts are surrendered to Jesus, we make better choices for ourselves and others. And there is support and protection in the body of Christ. But there are people out there who don’t know this yet. It’s up to us to share Christ love and truth with the those He brings into our lives and our church.

As we often say, the courts can make abortion illegal but only God through his church can make it unthinkable. The good news is, the abortion rate is declining but there are still so many we can reach out to with God’s love and healing!

—Luci

 

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