Pensamiento apestoso: Mi visión distorsionada de mí mismo

Pensamiento apestoso: Mi visión distorsionada de mí mismo

Pensamiento apestoso: Mi visión distorsionada de mí mismo


por Toni Weisz/Pensamiento apestoso

 

Referencias de las Escrituras: Isaías 43:18–19, Salmo 62:6-8, Salmo 27:10, John 8:32, y romanos 5:9

Pensamiento apestoso refers to the negative or disturbing thoughts that torment us, especialmente cuando estamos DETENER (hinfeliz, Aenojado, lsolo o tenojado). We will be looking at our distorted view of self. Aprenderemos a discernir la verdad de las mentiras que hemos creído toda nuestra vida.. Nuestro objetivo es equiparte para que puedas tener la victoria en cada área de tu vida..

Isaías 43:18–19
“No os acordéis de las cosas pasadas, ni considerar las cosas de antaño. Mirad, haré algo nuevo, ahora brotará; ¿No lo sabrás?? Incluso haré camino en el desierto y ríos en el desierto”.

Salmo 62: 6–8
“Él sólo es mi roca y mi salvación; el es mi defensa; Preferiría que no me movieran. En Dios está mi salvación y mi gloria.; La roca de mi fuerza, y mi refugio, esta en dios. Confía en Él en todo momento, Tu gente; derrama tu corazón delante de él; Dios es un refugio para nosotros."

Salmo 27:10
When my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will take care of me.

John 8:32
“And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”

Romanos 5:9
Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from wrath through Him.

I was the oldest of three and came from a strict second-generation, Italian-American family. My father and his two brothers and sister ran a family-owned construction company started by my grandfather.

My grandfather had a drinking problem. And my dad acted like an alcoholic even though he did not drink. I refer to his behavior as a “rageaholic.” He worked extremely long hours and was dealing with a lot of stress and family drama. No podía comunicarse de manera saludable sin enfadarse y alzar la voz.. He had a very short fuse. Entonces, cuando estaba en casa, Literalmente quisiera correr y esconderme..

My mom tried her best to control our home environment as not to cause my dad any stress. We had to be very quiet and obedient when he was home. The slightest thing could set him off. When my dad was at work, my mom had her own way of dealing with the chaos in our home. She yelled a lot too. It wasn’t a very calm or peaceful environment. But I believe they did the best they could. They were preoccupied with putting out fires that my sister and brother were starting. It was easy for me to hide in the shadows.

As a young child, how was I supposed to get the love and attention I needed? Después del “bueno, quiet one” persona was not working anymore, I started sneaking Scotch whiskey from my parents’ liquor cabinet at 12 años. Now I was really hiding because of all of my secrets, which now were piling up, and it became even more difficult to keep up my façade. Por 13, Me estaba drogando y consumiendo otras drogas.. En 16, I was having sex; then the unthinkable, my abortion at 21. My life was a disaster, one poor decision after another led me down a very dark path. I was very alone in this pit even though I had friends; no one really knew what I was suffering with because I wore the perfect mask. I was right where the evil one wanted me. Isolated, solo, and hiding in my secrets.

Now in my early 30’s after many years of destructive choices, Mecanismos de copia nocivos y adicciones., Mi autodesprecio estaba en su punto más alto. My depression would last for weeks at a time, and it was preventing me from functioning normally, and all the pain I had been stuffing all my life was coming out sideways. no tenia control sobre eso. Yo era como un volcán andante. I literally just wanted to end this torment of a life. But God gave me two children, and I wasn’t going to leave them without a mom. Entonces, I decided I needed to do something different because what I was doing was not working. I was tired of putting my mask on every day and pretending.

Sentí que no era digno de ser amado. De hecho, I thought I deserved to be emotionally abused by others because of my sin. No me veía como una persona valiosa para nadie., ni siquiera a dios. Este patrón destructivo continuaría hasta que yo fuera 34, cuando por la gracia de Dios, Escuché el evangelio y dentro 4 semanas fui salvo y le pedí a Jesús que perdonara mis pecados y fuera mi Señor y Salvador. El día más hermoso y memorable de mi vida es febrero. 6, 1994, cuando nací de nuevo.

Incluso después de mi salvación, I felt I had to work for love and approval from God and especially from others in leadership at Church. My people-pleasing was consuming my life, y Dios me mostró que esto es idolatría, that anything that I put above Him is a sin.

Over the past 20 años, God has slowly been showing me my character defects and areas of sin, my codependency, people-pleasing, and lack of clear boundaries and how I was enabling unhealthy behavior. I didn’t love or respect myself so how could I expect others to. I allowed people to walk all over me, to manipulate and control me, but slowly over time, I started putting up boundaries and using my voice.

God helped me to see myself through His eyes of love, care, and compassion. De nuevo en 2015 when struggling with rejection, I wrote out these words of affirmation that I read out loud to myself every day: Soy digno, soy amado, pertenezco, Soy aceptado, soy adoptado, Tengo confianza y soy competente., I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, soy un niño de Dios, Soy victorioso en Cristo, just to name a few. This is my Spiritual Armor; I put this on every morning to protect myself from the fiery darts of the enemy. Our battle is won and lost in our minds. What we believe about ourselves and about God matters. God’s word is truth, and the truth will make you free.

I hope I never take for granted the miracle that took place in my life 31 hace años que, when I received the gift of salvation through the blood of Jesus shed on the cross for me.

QUESTIONS TO TAKE TO HEART:

  1. How has your distorted view of yourself opened you up to all kinds of abuse and sin as a way to cope with your pain?
  2. How did you see yourself?
  3. Who does God say you are? Give examples of Biblical truth.
  4. What do you do to put your Spiritual Armor on daily to protect yourself from the enemy?
  5. Cómo podemos orar por ti?

I pray this topic has been helpful for you if you need to talk, you can text me or email me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

Eres amado, Toni

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Libertad en Cristo

Libertad en Cristo

John 8: 31-32, 34-36

Entonces Jesús dijo a los judíos que le creían.. “Si permanecéis en mi palabra, ustedes son mis discípulos en verdad. Y conoceréis la verdad y la verdad os hará libres”. Jesús les respondió, “Seguramente, te digo, Quien comete pecado es esclavo del pecado.. Y un esclavo no permanece en la casa para siempre., pero un hijo permanece para siempre. Por lo tanto, si el Hijo te hace libre, seréis verdaderamente libres”.

Gálatas 5:1 Estad, pues, firmes en la libertad con la que Cristo nos hizo libres., y no estéis otra vez sujetos al yugo de servidumbre.

Cita de Ravi Zacarías, “El pecado te llevará más lejos de lo que quieres ir, Mantenerte más tiempo del que quieres quedarte, y le costará más de lo que quiere pagar”.

Todos nacimos con una naturaleza pecaminosa., por la caída de Adán y Eva en el jardín, cuando Eva tomó el fruto y lo comió y se lo dio a su marido para que comiera también, Fue entonces cuando el pecado entró en el mundo.. El pecado es destructivo y todos somos siervos del pecado.. Debido a nuestra naturaleza pecaminosa estamos orgullosos, egoísta, mentirosos, desobediente, borrachos, y asesinos, etc.. No tenemos la capacidad de detener este ciclo destructivo hasta que encontremos al único que nunca ha pecado., Su nombre es Jesús nuestro Salvador y Redentor..

¿Qué significa la libertad en Cristo?? La libertad en Cristo significa que ya no pertenezco a Satanás y ya no soy esclavo del pecado., haciendo cosas que son impías. tengo una nueva naturaleza, la biblia dice cuando me confieso y me arrepiento (doblar) de mis pecados y creo en mi corazón que Jesús es el Hijo de Dios, que he nacido de nuevo. Ahora nazco del Espíritu de Dios. Soy adoptado en la familia de Dios.. Cuando nazco de nuevo, el Espíritu Santo ahora mora en mí.. Ahora tengo la capacidad, con la ayuda del Espíritu Santo, de tomar buenas decisiones que glorifiquen a Dios..

La muerte de Jesús en la cruz pagó mi deuda de pecado., él fue mi propiciación, mi sustituto, Él pagó la pena por todos mis pecados y los pecados del mundo entero cuando murió en la cruz. 2000 hace años que. Por su muerte por mí, Ahora soy irreprochable ante Dios, Mis pecados han sido cubiertos por la sangre del Cordero., Todo lo que Dios ve es la justicia de Cristo.. Dios me rescato de las garras del diablo, quien una vez me mantuvo cautivo, y me puso en la palma de su mano. ahora pertenezco a dios.

Como creyente en Jesús tengo libertad del juicio del Gran Trono Blanco., que es para aquellos que no conocen a Jesús como su Salvador personal. Hay un lugar literal llamado infierno que fue creado para el diablo y sus ángeles.. Al Padre le entristece que alguno esté en el infierno.. Esta es la razón por la que estoy compartiendo esto con ustedes hoy., es el deseo de Dios que nadie perezca sino que todos tengan vida eterna, Te estoy dando esta información ahora, así que si no estás seguro de tu relación con Jesús, ahora es el momento de asegurarla.. estoy disponible para hablar, por favor envíeme un correo electrónico a arwsg4u2@gmail.com, y discutiremos esto más a fondo para que puedas estar seguro de que tienes vida eterna y que cuando mueras estarás en el cielo con Jesús..

Si eres creyente estás ante el tribunal de Cristo., el asiento bema, eres juzgado en base a las cosas buenas o malas que se hacen en la tierra. Recibirás recompensas o te las quitarán.. Tienes garantizado un hogar en el cielo para siempre.. Un lugar donde no hay más pena ni muerte ni llanto, donde Dios enjugará las lágrimas de nuestros ojos.

Tengo libertad para vivir mi vida de una manera nueva.. En lugar de ser egoísta y orgulloso soy un siervo de Dios., Yo soy sus manos y pies en este mundo., para ministrar su amor, gracia, y compasión hacia todos los que me rodean. Ahora estoy más preocupado por las necesidades de los demás que por las mías.. Lo mínimo que puedo hacer es servirle por lo que Él ha hecho por mí.. Tengo una nueva vida, un nuevo propósito, una nueva familia y un hogar en el cielo cuando muera. Yo también vemos a mi dulce José, mi hijo que aborté. 40 hace años que. ¡Qué dulce día será ese!, No puedo esperar para besar la mejilla de mi hijo y abrazar su cuello..

 

Preguntas de discusión

¿Alguna vez te has confesado y arrepentido? (se alejó) de tus pecados a Dios y ¿crees que Jesús es el Cordero de Dios sin pecado que murió en la cruz por tus pecados??

Si no estás seguro de tu relación con Jesús, por favor envíeme un correo electrónico para que podamos hablar con mayor detalle.

 

Dios lo bendiga,

Toni

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Límites: por qué son tan importantes?

Límites: por qué son tan importantes?

Salmo 34:18, Jeremías 29:11, John 3:16

Personal boundaries, as defined by Psychology today, “Are the limits we set with other people, which indicate what we will accept and what we consider unacceptable behavior towards us. To know our boundaries comes from a healthy view of ourselves.” When that view is distorted due to emotional trauma as children (whether we did not get the love and care from our family which is a Type A Trauma or we were sexually, emotionally, or physically abused as children which is Type B Trauma). All these experiences as children cause us to have a distorted view of ourselves, Dios, and others and it prevents us from maturing into healthy stable adults. (Living from the Heart Jesus Gave You, A Life Model Book)

This distorted view of ourselves especially those of us who have had abortions opens up the door to all kinds of unhealthy and destructive behavior. God created women to love and nurture their children and then we did the opposite. Our hopes and dreams as young girls are dashed, and we are now open to all kinds of unhealthy destructive coping mechanisms and ungodly behavior to deal with our pain. Our very souls are tormented and we feel desperately alone, depressed and even suicidal.

So how can we stop this destructive cycle of accepting and enabling unhealthy behavior from others? Primero, we must realize we have a Savior and a friend who is the lover of our soul, and His name is Jesus. He is the only one that can heal our broken spirits, our broken bodies and our broken minds. Salmo 34:18 ESV “The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves the crushed in spirit.” He is the only one that can take the disaster we have made of our lives and restore order and peace. And He alone can give us a new hope, new dreams, un nuevo propósito, and a new life. Jeremías 29:11 NKJV, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

In childhood, I did not learn what healthy boundaries look like. I became a people pleaser at a very young age and as a result I allowed people to take advantage of me and treat me very poorly and I never said a word. I wondered why I never truly felt loved by others; what was it? I was allowing all kinds of unhealthy behavior because I didn’t love and respect myself, especially after my abortion. I now despised myself. I didn’t understand why others didn’t treat me with love, kindness and compassion. I realized they cannot give what they do not have. But that took many decades for me to come to that understanding. I also recognized that they did the best they could with what they had and I released them into God’s Hands and started praying for and forgave them.

We all have our wounds and issues from our past, which causes us to be self-consumed and blinded, and we cannot see how we are hurting others closest to us. Only God can give us awareness and the courage to stop accepting unacceptable behavior and establish healthy boundaries. For the first time, I used my voice to explain my boundaries and insist they be respected. There was some push back but I was not going to waiver. At first, putting up boundaries is hard to do. But as God heals us, we get stronger, bolder and more courageous, and we no longer want to just exist, we want to experience the abundant life Jesus came to give us. The first step in recovery is recognizing my life is unmanageable and I need God to help me.

Querido, I want you to know that God loves you so much that He sent His Son to die on the cross for you. (John 3:16) Have you received this gift of love and forgiveness from God? If not you can do that today? If you do know the Lord, then ask Him to help you to love yourself and to have courage to put up boundaries and no longer accept unhealthy behavior. He will help you if you ask Him, He did it for me and I know He will do it for you too.

 

 

Bendiciones,

Toni

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Pensamiento apestoso: Ansiedad

Pensamiento apestoso: Ansiedad

Pensamiento apestoso: Ansiedad

por Toni Weisz/Pensamiento apestoso

Escrituras: filipenses 4:6-7, mateo 6:25-26, 31 y 33, Salmo 121:2 and Matthew 10:31

filipenses 4:6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication (humbly asking) with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God, and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

mateo 6:25-26, 31, y 33
“Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not your life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather in barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? “Therefore, do not worry, diciendo, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For after all these things the gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added to you.”

Salmo 121:2
My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.

 

When I was a young child, I worried about everything. When I left a homework assignment at home accidentally, I went into a panic. What is my teacher going to think or say to me?

Frantically, I would call my mom, “Can you please bring my assignment to school?"

She said to me, “You are such a worry wart.”

I was so anxious that my perfect mask would be exposed, that people might see the real me, an insecure people-pleaser, seeking approval from others so I could feel good about myself. I so desperately needed to feel like I belonged, that I was a person of value. I was continually striving for perfection to receive love and accolades from others. But that didn’t work; it only left me feeling alone and depleted.

As an adult, I became anxious when I negatively projected into the future. When I did this, I felt weak, hopeless, and discouraged. My head and eyes were cast down, and I felt like giving up. But when I recognized I was looking inward, then I reminded myself, “My help comes from the Lord," (Salmo 121:2) and I looked up to heaven.

God has promised us in His Word that He will meet all of our needs. “Are you not of more value than many sparrows?” Matthew 10:31

But unfortunately, I did not trust Him. I made some very bad decisions because I did not trust Him with my future, my life, my marriage, or my children. I had to be in control, and relinquishing that control was a scary thing for me.

I thought I could minimize my anxiety by trying to control everyone and everything. But I realized that was impossible to do, and it made me very frustrated and emotionally drained. I used to jump in to fix, rescate, and save others because I became anxious about all the what ifs.

I realized I cannot save, rescate, or fix anyone; only God can. I was sinning against God by not trusting Him in every area of my life. I had to believe He is a good God and He can take care of me and my family.

I remember in my journaling, God telling me, “Get out of My way; you are preventing Me from working in your family.” IN ALL CAPS, TOO. God was not happy with me. God showed me that my lack of trust in Him was a sin and putting others before Him was an idol. He showed me that He was not like my earthly parents; He was kind and gentle, cariñoso, caring, and full of compassion. I repented and turned away from my sin of unbelief and turned to God.

I no longer struggle with feeling anxious. I have learned to pray and bring all my concerns to Him. I believe only He can provide for all my needs. I am finally free of that sick thinking and character defect that kept me stuck and fretting for so many decades.

Gracias, Caballero, for the gift of your presence in my life, for the Holy Spirit to remind me that I am Yours!!! Thank you that I am not alone; You are always with me.

Preguntas para tomar en serio:

  1. Did you struggle with anxiety? What kinds of things would make you anxious?
  2. Are you still struggling with anxiety?
  3. What are some things you do to help you overcome your anxiety?
  4. Cómo podemos orar por ti?

Espero que este tema te haya sido útil.. Por favor comuníquese si necesita hablar: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

Eres amado,

Toni

Pensamiento apestoso: Justificación: justificando mi pecado

Pensamiento apestoso: Justificación: justificando mi pecado

Pensamiento apestoso: Justifying My Sin

por Toni Weisz/Pensamiento apestoso

Escrituras: Génesis 3:8-13 y proverbios 11:14b

“And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, y Adán y su esposa se escondieron de la presencia del Señor Dios entre los árboles del jardín.. Entonces el Señor Dios llamó a Adán y le dijo, "Dónde estás?” So he said, “Escuché tu voz en el jardín, y tuve miedo porque estaba desnudo; and I hid myself.” And He said, “¿Quién te dijo que estabas desnuda?? ¿Has comido del árbol del cual te mandé que no comieras??” Then the man said, “La mujer que me diste por compañera, ella me dio del arbol, and I ate.” And the Lord God said to the woman, “¿Qué es esto que has hecho??” The woman said, “La serpiente me engañó, and I ate.” Genesis 3:8-13

Yo defino la justificación, more specifically, justifying my sin, as the distorted belief that I am making a right or reasonable decision when, in fact, the opposite is true. He escuchado casi todas las excusas para justificar la elección de una mujer por abortar.; Yo tuve varios. I allowed the enemy to isolate me and lie to me, tal como lo hizo con Adán y Eva cuando comieron del fruto prohibido y pecaron contra Dios.

Como resultado de mi pecado, I rushed to make my decision and did not ask for help or discuss it with anyone. Es con lo único que nosotras como mujeres no pedimos ayuda., porqué es eso? Hablamos con nuestros amigos o familiares sobre otras decisiones que tomamos., pero ¿por qué no este??

Creo que el enemigo inmediatamente ataca y comienza a inundar nuestras mentes con todo tipo de caos., junto con mentiras, miedo, y ansiedad. This combination is overwhelming to our minds, and we scramble to stop the noise in our heads so we can return to normal.

No tuve mi aborto hasta mi segundo trimestre, but I had my mind made up immediately that I was going to have an abortion. I had to wait months to have my procedure because I didn’t follow protocol and ate before my first scheduled abortion and had to reschedule. I had to make two abortion appointments! Tal vez Dios me estaba dando una manera de escapar, pero no estaba buscando su consejo. En cambio, I felt justified in my decision to move forward with the abortion.

The reasons I used to justify my sin of abortion were the following: Creí la mentira de que mi bebé sufriría graves deformaciones porque estaba consumiendo drogas fuertes., bebiendo excesivamente, y fumar 2-3 paquetes de cigarrillos por día. I was still in college in Ohio with no job and I thought, “I can’t have a child now!” I believed the father of the child would leave me to raise the child on my own.

Pero la razón más importante fue que tenía miedo de contarles a mis padres.. I regret that I did not have the courage to admit to my parents that I made a mistake and I needed help. Nunca les di la oportunidad de opinar sobre mi decisión porque tomé el asunto en mis propias manos.. Mi miedo y mi orgullo me impidieron decir la verdad.. I wish I had told them because I could have my 45-year-old son with me today. Pero no puedo volver atrás y cambiar mi pasado.. All I can do is learn from it and understand why this broken frightened woman could not tell her parents the truth.

I remember after watching the movie, "No planificado", Estaba en el lavabo de mi cuarto de lavado y el Espíritu Santo susurró a mi corazón., “Every child in the womb is mine.” Tears filled my eyes and I replied, “I know, Caballero, and I robbed you of the baby in my womb and I am so sorry.”

El pecado nunca se justifica. Mirando hacia atrás a nuestros primeros padres, Adán y Eva, we see they pointed their finger at someone else to justify their sin before God. The exchange is quite interesting, and we use the same tactics today. In Genesis Chapter 3, after Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit, God called to them, "Dónde estás?” God called Adam by his name wanting him to confess his sin, but instead he justified his sin and accused the woman who God gave him. And Eve likewise accused the serpent. En lugar de asumir la responsabilidad de sus pecados, culparon a alguien más. Su orgullo les impidió humillarse ante Dios y arrepentirse de su pecado.. Mi orgullo me impidió pedir ayuda a mis padres y a Dios en mi decisión de abortar.. En cambio, I listened to the devil, y sufrí durante años a consecuencia de mi decisión.

For you dear ones who have been abused, rejected, and abandoned by those who were supposed to love and nurture you, the pain of what you endured just breaks my heart. It broke God’s too. God wants you healed. He is a good Father. He is kind, compassionate, cariñoso, faithful, and full of grace. He is not like your earthly family who are flawed and a product of their own destructive home environments. Your Father in heaven is perfect. He is love; it is His character.

We are here to help you make life-affirming, God-glorifying decisions in your lives. Proverbios 11:14b, “In the multitude of counselors, there is safety.” Please reach out if you are struggling with making good decisions that honor God. You can break the unhealthy destructive cycle and replace it with one that is pleasing to God and gives you peace in your soul.

Preguntas para tomar en serio:

1. ¿Cuáles fueron tus razones para abortar?(s) que en su momento sentiste que estabas justificado? ¿Cuáles fueron las mentiras que creíste??

2. For those who have been abused, how did you justify this sin against you? ¿Cuáles fueron las mentiras que creíste??

3. ¿Cuál es la verdad que Dios te ha mostrado??

4. Cómo podemos orar por ti?

Por favor comuníquese si necesita hablar. You can email me at: toni@myashestobeauty.com. Please don’t suffer alone anymore. You have a community of women who are available to walk alongside you to help you.

Eres amado,

Toni

 

 

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