Menos controle & Mais confiança

Menos controle & Mais confiança

Provérbios 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding: In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.

Who or what are you trusting in: yourself, another person, an institution, or God?

I learned at a very young age to take control of every area of my life, that unfortunately was not a good thing. A 12-year-old is not mature enough to take on such a responsibility. I controlled my voice, I did not use it, I controlled how I performed in school, sports, and in anything I set my mind to do by practicing until I could do something perfectly. When I was older, I controlled my weight by taking speed and diet pills and exercising excessively. I controlled what others perceived about me by wearing a mask to hide my true feeling and identity.

Relinquishing control was not a comfortable thing for me, because I didn’t trust others not to hurt me. I became very self-sufficient and proficient in all I did. I had a huge wall around my heart that no one was going to penetrate, not even God. I grew up with a distorted view of God; He was angry and He would punish me if I was out of line, this is what I heard and saw as a child. Church was dark, they spoke in another language, it was not warm and welcoming. então, I attributed these attributes to God. I felt He was dark and harsh and unloving; nothing could be further from the truth.

I had everything under control so I thought, until my life and health started spiraling out of control, I couldn’t stuff anymore and my health was failing, my marriage was on the brink of divorce, and I didn’t know what to do. I was plagued with suicidal thoughts because I just couldn’t deal with my depression and self-loathing anymore. This was not a life it was a prison; I was just surviving I needed someone to take my pain away, someone I could trust to love and accept me for who I was. Did such a person exist?

Dear One I want you to know that there is such a person, His name is Jesus, He is the only one who will love you right where you are, He will never hurt you or force you to do something against your will. He is kind, loving, dependable, faithful, merciful, forgiving, and He is your Savior and friend. Why not relinquish control of your life to God, honestly what do you have to lose at this point?

Mateus 6:33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.

 

Bênçãos,

Toni

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Limites - Por que são tão importantes?

Limites - Por que são tão importantes?

Salmo 34:18, Jeremiah 29:11, John 3:16

Personal boundaries, as defined by Psychology today, “Are the limits we set with other people, which indicate what we will accept and what we consider unacceptable behavior towards us. To know our boundaries comes from a healthy view of ourselves.” When that view is distorted due to emotional trauma as children (whether we did not get the love and care from our family which is a Type A Trauma or we were sexually, emotionally, or physically abused as children which is Type B Trauma). All these experiences as children cause us to have a distorted view of ourselves, Deus, and others and it prevents us from maturing into healthy stable adults. (Living from the Heart Jesus Gave You, A Life Model Book)

This distorted view of ourselves especially those of us who have had abortions opens up the door to all kinds of unhealthy and destructive behavior. God created women to love and nurture their children and then we did the opposite. Our hopes and dreams as young girls are dashed, and we are now open to all kinds of unhealthy destructive coping mechanisms and ungodly behavior to deal with our pain. Our very souls are tormented and we feel desperately alone, depressed and even suicidal.

So how can we stop this destructive cycle of accepting and enabling unhealthy behavior from others? Primeiro, we must realize we have a Savior and a friend who is the lover of our soul, and His name is Jesus. He is the only one that can heal our broken spirits, our broken bodies and our broken minds. Salmo 34:18 ESV “The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves the crushed in spirit.” He is the only one that can take the disaster we have made of our lives and restore order and peace. And He alone can give us a new hope, new dreams, um novo propósito, and a new life. Jeremiah 29:11 NVI, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

In childhood, I did not learn what healthy boundaries look like. I became a people pleaser at a very young age and as a result I allowed people to take advantage of me and treat me very poorly and I never said a word. I wondered why I never truly felt loved by others; what was it? I was allowing all kinds of unhealthy behavior because I didn’t love and respect myself, especialmente depois do meu aborto. I now despised myself. I didn’t understand why others didn’t treat me with love, kindness and compassion. I realized they cannot give what they do not have. But that took many decades for me to come to that understanding. I also recognized that they did the best they could with what they had and I released them into God’s Hands and started praying for and forgave them.

We all have our wounds and issues from our past, which causes us to be self-consumed and blinded, and we cannot see how we are hurting others closest to us. Only God can give us awareness and the courage to stop accepting unacceptable behavior and establish healthy boundaries. For the first time, I used my voice to explain my boundaries and insist they be respected. There was some push back but I was not going to waiver. At first, putting up boundaries is hard to do. But as God heals us, we get stronger, bolder and more courageous, and we no longer want to just exist, we want to experience the abundant life Jesus came to give us. The first step in recovery is recognizing my life is unmanageable and I need God to help me.

Querido, I want you to know that God loves you so much that He sent His Son to die on the cross for you. (John 3:16) Have you received this gift of love and forgiveness from God? If not you can do that today? If you do know the Lord, then ask Him to help you to love yourself and to have courage to put up boundaries and no longer accept unhealthy behavior. He will help you if you ask Him, He did it for me and I know He will do it for you too.

 

 

Bênçãos,

Toni

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Pensamento fedorento: Ansiedade

Pensamento fedorento: Ansiedade

Pensamento fedorento: Ansiedade

por Toni Weisz/Stinking Thinking

Escrituras: Filipenses 4:6-7, Mateus 6:25-26, 31 e 33, Salmo 121:2 and Matthew 10:31

Filipenses 4:6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication (humbly asking) with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God, and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Mateus 6:25-26, 31, e 33
“Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not your life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather in barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? “Therefore, do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For after all these things the gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added to you.”

Salmo 121:2
My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.

 

When I was a young child, I worried about everything. When I left a homework assignment at home accidentally, I went into a panic. What is my teacher going to think or say to me?

Frantically, I would call my mom, “Can you please bring my assignment to school?”

She said to me, “You are such a worry wart.”

I was so anxious that my perfect mask would be exposed, that people might see the real me, an insecure people-pleaser, seeking approval from others so I could feel good about myself. I so desperately needed to feel like I belonged, that I was a person of value. I was continually striving for perfection to receive love and accolades from others. But that didn’t work; it only left me feeling alone and depleted.

As an adult, I became anxious when I negatively projected into the future. When I did this, I felt weak, hopeless, and discouraged. My head and eyes were cast down, and I felt like giving up. But when I recognized I was looking inward, then I reminded myself, “My help comes from the Lord,” (Salmo 121:2) and I looked up to heaven.

God has promised us in His Word that He will meet all of our needs. “Are you not of more value than many sparrows?” Matthew 10:31

But unfortunately, I did not trust Him. I made some very bad decisions because I did not trust Him with my future, my life, my marriage, or my children. I had to be in control, and relinquishing that control was a scary thing for me.

I thought I could minimize my anxiety by trying to control everyone and everything. But I realized that was impossible to do, and it made me very frustrated and emotionally drained. I used to jump in to fix, resgatar, and save others because I became anxious about all the what ifs.

I realized I cannot save, resgatar, or fix anyone; only God can. I was sinning against God by not trusting Him in every area of my life. I had to believe He is a good God and He can take care of me and my family.

I remember in my journaling, God telling me, “Get out of My way; you are preventing Me from working in your family.” IN ALL CAPS, TOO. God was not happy with me. God showed me that my lack of trust in Him was a sin and putting others before Him was an idol. He showed me that He was not like my earthly parents; He was kind and gentle, loving, caring, and full of compassion. I repented and turned away from my sin of unbelief and turned to God.

I no longer struggle with feeling anxious. I have learned to pray and bring all my concerns to Him. I believe only He can provide for all my needs. I am finally free of that sick thinking and character defect that kept me stuck and fretting for so many decades.

Obrigada, senhor, for the gift of your presence in my life, for the Holy Spirit to remind me that I am Yours!!! Thank you that I am not alone; You are always with me.

Perguntas para levar a sério:

  1. Did you struggle with anxiety? What kinds of things would make you anxious?
  2. Are you still struggling with anxiety?
  3. What are some things you do to help you overcome your anxiety?
  4. Como podemos orar por você?

Rezo para que este tópico tenha sido útil para você. Entre em contato se precisar conversar: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

Você é amado,

Toni

Pensamento fedorento: Pensamentos negativos

Pensamento fedorento: Pensamentos negativos

Pensamento fedorento: Pensamentos negativos

por Toni Weisz/Stinking Thinking

Escrituras: 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 e Filipenses 4:8-9

O pensamento fedorento se refere aos pensamentos negativos que nos atormentam, especialmente quando estamos HALT (Hsem raiva, UMAcom raiva, euapenas ou Tirado) Isso nos leva a ter uma visão distorcida de Deus, auto, Pensamento negativo, justificação, medo, e ansiedade. Abordaremos cada um desses tópicos para que possamos discernir entre as mentiras em que acreditamos ao longo dos anos e substituí-las pela verdade de Deus. Nosso objetivo é equipá-lo para que possa ter vitória nessas áreas.

2 Corinthians 10:3-5 NVI
“Pois embora andemos na carne, Não temos guerra de acordo com a carne. Pois as armas de nossa guerra não são carnais, mas poderosas através de Deus por derrubar fortalezas, lançando argumentos e tudo o que se exalta acima do conhecimento de Deus, Sexendo todos os pensamentos em cativeiro à obediência de Cristo. ”

Filipenses 4:8-9 NVI
"Finalmente, Irmãos, o que quer que seja verdade, Quaisquer que sejam as coisas honestas, Quaisquer que sejam as coisas apenas, Quaisquer que sejam as coisas puras, Quaisquer que sejam as coisas adoráveis, Quaisquer que sejam as coisas de um bom relatório, Se houver alguma virtude e se houver algo louvável, Medite sobre essas coisas. As coisas que você aprendeu e recebeu, e ouvi e vi em mim, estes fazem, E o Deus da paz estará com. ”

Todos nós conhecemos uma pessoa que pode sugar todo o ar de uma sala porque cada palavra que sai da boca é negativa. Você já experimentou isso antes? É emocionalmente desgastante estar na companhia de uma pessoa negativa por um longo período de tempo antes de também sermos arrastados para o poço com eles. Você está atormentado por pensamentos negativos?

O inimigo está continuamente tentando nos viajar porque seu objetivo é nos fazer focar nas coisas negativas em vez de todas as coisas pelas quais devemos ser gratos. Você tem uma lista de gratidão? Se você não, Eu sugiro que você faça um hoje, e escreva todas as coisas pelas quais você é grato. Quando você sente um pensamento negativo chegando, Basta sair da sua lista e lembrar -se que Deus ainda está no trono e está no controle e ele está ciente de tudo o que está acontecendo no mundo. Ele usa tudo isso para seu propósito e planos em todas as nossas vidas. Devemos lembrar que Deus é bom o tempo todo e Ele é amor; Esse é o seu personagem. Ele nunca muda. Ele é o mesmo ontem, hoje, e para sempre.

O campo de batalha é realmente a mente. TO chapéu é onde começa a guerra espiritual, E é aí que temos a opção de aceitar ou não. Agora mesmo, Há ódio e limpeza étnica em certas partes do mundo, Guerras e devastação devido a terremotos, incêndios, lâminas de lama. Mqualquer um tem medo, em desespero, e me sentindo sem esperança. But como crentes, Precisamos procurar ainda mais o Senhor agora, então temos sua perspectiva sobre isso. No que você está se concentrando agora? Você se sente pacífico, esperançoso ou deprimido e sem esperança?

Tenho uma lista de verdades bíblicas que li todas as manhãs para me lembrar que sou adotado e amado por Deus. É assim que eu coloco minha armadura para me proteger dos dardos ardentes do inimigo.

Quem eu sou em Cristo, para combater a rejeição

Eu sou digno.
Eu sou amado.
Eu sou aceito.
Eu sou adotado.
Estou confiante e competente.
Eu sou um filho de Deus.
Eu tenho o Espírito Santo dentro de mim.
Eu sou vitorioso em Cristo.
Sou perdoado por todos os meus pecados e limpo de toda a minha injustiça.
Eu tenho um lar no céu.
Nada pode me separar do amor de Deus em Cristo Jesus, Meu Senhor.
Eu sou valorizado por Deus.
Eu sou seu filho precioso.
Não vou temer o mal!

Quando eu leio isso todas as manhãs, Isso protege minha mente e meu coração das mentiras e pensamentos negativos em que o inimigo quer que eu me concentre. Quando não leio minha lista diariamente, Estou vulnerável aos dispositivos do inimigo; Estou impaciente, cruel, auto-justificado, julgamento, e facilmente frustrado.

senhor, Você está me mostrando que hoje, na verdade, Devo reservar um tempo com você todas as manhãs; Você é minha prioridade. REading sua palavra diariamente é comida para minha alma. PRaying é um momento para eu ouvir de ouvir de Sou para falar com Sou. JNossa mora é uma época em que eu mais vou mais com você, buscando Snossa sabedoria e querer muito ouvir Svocê me liderar e me guiar na minha vida e em tudo o que faço porque quero que minha vida seja agradável a Sou, E eu quero Svocê ser glorificado através dele. Obrigada, senhor, por me lembrar e me condenar disso hoje.

Pai no céu, Eu oro por cada mulher lendo este blog. Eu rezo para que eles procurem Sou com todo o coração. Mostre a eles quanto Svocê os amo de uma maneira muito real e tangível. Proteja -os das mentiras e pensamentos negativos do inimigo, e ajude -os a se concentrar nas coisas que são verdadeiras, honesto, apenas, puro, amável, e de bom relatório. Renove suas mentes diariamente enquanto lêem sua palavra. Curá -los e amarrar suas feridas como somente você pode, para SSomente o poderoso conselheiro e um ótimo médico. Encontre -os onde eles estão e lidere com sua mão direita justa. Perdoe todos os seus pecados e cure -os, senhor. Obrigado pelo seu amor, misericórdia, graça, e compaixão sobre eles. Oramos isso no nome poderoso de Jesus. Amém.

Perguntas para levar a sério:

  1. Você luta com pensamentos negativos?
  2. Com que frequência você é atormentado por esses pensamentos?
  3. Existe uma pessoa ou situação que faz com que você comece a pensar negativamente?
  4. O que você fez para ajudar a se proteger desse tipo de pensamento negativo?
  5. Como podemos orar por você?

Entre em contato. Ce adoraria ouvir de você. Envie-me um e-mail para: toni@myashestobeauty.com.

Você é amado,
Toni

 

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Quando eu finalmente recebeu o amor de Jesus em meu coração

Quando eu finalmente recebeu o amor de Jesus em meu coração

Desde quando eu era criança, I did not use my voice and hid in the background to keep under the radar. Como resultado, I became what people wanted me to be. I was labeled, “The good, quiet one.” I was fearful of rejection, so I became a people pleaser. I believed the lie that if I were perfect, I would be loved. That’s when I started wearing a mask.

My need for love and acceptance caused me to hide parts of myself. I only showed the good sides so people would love me. Then, when I was 12 anos, I started sneaking whiskey from my parents’ liquor cabinet. Now, I was really hiding. I didn’t want my parents to find out. They were very strict with me being the oldest, and I didn’t want them to be angry or disappointed in me.

As I got older, my sins were more and more grievous, and my secrets became bigger and bigger. então, I isolated even more and hid everything. My mask morphed as I got older. As a child, I strived for perfection. I was a good student, good athlete, and an all-around good child. When that wasn’t working, I tapped into a lifestyle of alcohol, drugs and sex. When I was home, I was still the good one. But in high school, I was hanging out with those who smoked and did drugs.

Neste ponto, people pleasing ruled my life. All I strove for were accolades from others and a place I could fit in and feel safe. But I would not find that for a long time. Honestamente, I lost my own identity because I wanted to fit in with others. I no longer knew what I liked or what I wanted to do because I became a chameleon and changed depending upon the group I was with. I had lost my own identity striving to please others.

I felt unloved and lost. My drinking and drug use were out of control. I was a walking time bomb. I hated myself and felt so depressed. I struggled with keeping it all together. When I found out I was pregnant as a 21-year-old college student, I panicked. This pregnancy did not fit the narrative I was allowing my parents to see. I was not the good, quieto. I was doing very ungodly, sinful destructive things, and now I was going to terminate my baby’s life.

How did I end up here? My whole life was a lie. I will have an abortion and act as if everything was fine. But everything wasn’t fine. After this traumatic event, I was more depressed than before, crying all the time and drinking more. My self-loathing and suicidal thoughts were now continually plaguing me. I just wanted to die so this torment would stop. It was too hard to keep up this façade. Slowly my mask was cracking, and I was so afraid of being exposed. All my sins and lies would come flooding out. I was scared.

In my early 30’s I had a physical and emotional break down. I could not function normally at all. I would lay on the couch for weeks at a time. All the years of stuffing and lying and all the pain I had been holding in all my life were starting to come out sideways. I was a walking volcano, spilling hot ash on anyone who got in my way. I was extremely emotional. I felt I could not look anyone in the eyes because if I did, I would not be able to stop crying.

Slowly I started recognizing I needed help. I needed someone who would love me, accept me, and heal me. I needed a Savior. Then on January 2, 1994, I heard the gospel for the first time. Within 4 weeks I gave my heart to Jesus, confessed my sins, turned from my old ways and turned toward God. I am coming up on the 26th anniversary of my salvation, and it is still the sweetest day of my life. It is the day I finally surrendered my life to God and allowed Him to heal my broken body, my broken heart and my broken mind. He transformed me into the woman He created me to be: a loving, confident woman filled with joy and peace. I have been adopted into the family of God; Eu sou aceito, and I am finally loved. I feel safe to be me. I can take the mask off now because I am finally home.

Are you wearing a mask?

What does your mask look like?

Do you have the courage to take off the mask and be real?

I pray that as God heals you, you will be filled with His love and you will have the courage to take off your mask.

Bênçãos,

Toni

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